There is No Break

It's remarkable that in six days, preseason training will begin in full for Arsenal.

I personally follow many other sports, and in most of those team oriented sports, there is a definitive period where you can take a rest or a breather from the sport. It usually goes from regular season to the playoffs to the free agent period. After that, it'll be a couple of months minimum where you won't even have to think about that particular sport.

This is not true with football. Maybe once in a four year period is there a break from football, if you're something more than a casual fan. One summer it's the World Cup, another summer it's the European Cup. Even a tournament like the Confederations Cup provides a football fan entertainment.

Of course, club football does stop for a month proper. But with a never ending slew of transfer links, you never take a proper break. And so it is with Arsenal.

Wenger wanted to bring in all the new players before preseason started, and that may or may not happen considering we're a few days away.

Felipe Melo was a player who may have interested us, but now has committed to Fiorentina. He should no longer be a target, and to be frank, I don't think he's worth 15-20 million euros. He doesn't look vastly superior to his midfield partner for the seleção, and that man is a former Arsenal player himself.

I think an option in central midfield may be needed, but Wenger knows better than anybody. After all, both Neves and Alex Song got a full years worth of experience there.

It is a preference, but just because the preseason starts doesn't mean we'll close up shop. We'll wait to see what develops. Adebayor may go or stay. We may sign Chamakh or not.

The real joy for me is the fact that Arshavin will begin to develop a better understanding with some of our players. That really excites me.

That's Entertainment

For those anti-international football types who didn’t notice, there was a final played yesterday. The Confederations Cup is nothing but a show that FIFA likes to put on. It does serve two purposes though – the host nation gets to show the rest of the world that they are ready to welcome them and of course FIFA makes even more money.

If you wanted something to do on a Sunday, watching the U.S.A. nearly stage what would have been a tremendous upset victory over Brazil was probably as good an option as any. The game started with Brazil pinning the U.S. back in its own half. I lost count of how many crosses Maicon sent into the box. The North Americans looked shaky at the back.

And then unexpectedly if not fortunately, Clint Dempsey scored against the run of play. It looked like he barely made contact with the ball but it counted nonetheless.

Brazil 0 - U.S.A. 1!

The goal sent shockwaves and anxiety through fans of the Seleção. Not to be outdone by his teammate, in the 26th minute Landon Donavan finished a superbly executed counter-attack.

Brazil 0 – U.S.A. 2!

So the first half finished with the most unlikely of score lines. Brazil had it all to do. The U.S. only had to hold their lead for just 45 minutes.

I’ve liked Luis Fabiano since his days at Sao Paulo. Excellent first touch! Good finisher! I like the player. I felt it was just a matter of time until he made his mark on the match. Quickly after the second half started, he did just that. Kaka scored but it was not allowed. Luis Fabiano then scored the equalizer to set up a dramatic winner by captain Lúcio.

My only gripe about the game is how the debacle we’d just witnessed was less important in the eyes of the American presenters than the wow effect of having had ‘a two-goal lead over Brazil for the first time ever’. OK! Brazil represents the pinnacle of international football. Losing to them is never a cause for shame or embarrassment. But to be up two goals and then give up four unanswered (Kaka’s was clearly a legitimate goal) is unacceptable. I felt as though it had been the U.S. U19s who’d been beaten by the full Brazilian team.

I’m not sure if I agree with the loss being a moral victory. Not even Coach Bradley (at least not in the interviews I saw) said anything about surrendering a two-goal lead. I expected more analysis of how and why the lead was conceded. Homage to Brazil’s prowess and playing up the fact that the U.S. had done well just to get to the final wasn’t enough for me.

That is minor though in the grand scheme. More importantly, the match was exciting, played at high tempo, and in a good spirit. You could see that the North Americans were determined to give Coach Bradley selection options if not headaches when time comes to finalize his World Cup roster, especially after the poor displays in the earlier matches. You could see that the Brazilians were playing with the pride that anyone who wears the famous yellow jersey is expected to do.

The Confederations Cup is a show. Let’s be clear about that. Arsenal fans could be forgiven for having mild interest in Gilberto’s participation and serious concern that the additional matches only increase Cesc’s risk for injury. But for the football fan who just wants to be entertained, yesterday’s final was not the match to use as criticism of FIFA.

I along with many millions watching were entertained.

Mike Riley

This man is now the Premier League’s referees chief.

The negative is that this man is not a good referee and a Manchester United supporting stiff.

The positive is that at least he won’t ref our matches anymore.

Manchester United fans always claim they’re being screwed by the authorities. Sir Alex Ferguson does much the same. But when David Gill is on the board of the FA, how can this really be possible?

Will Riley have a similar influence? I doubt it.

And even if he did, we just have to persevere through it. That’s what Champions do.

Once we win one trophy, we’ll be on our way.

Michael Jackson RIP

Whatever negative press Michael Jackson has received over the years - most notably his child sex abuse allegations - there is no doubt that as a performer he was the best. Jackson's best years were 1978-1986 where he produced three great albums: Off The Wall, Thriller and Bad.

Thriller is when Michael Jackson's status as being cool among youth peaked. I lost count of the amount of red leather jackets that were worn by young men in London during 1983. Such was the impact of his video Thriller.

His music during the late 1970's and early 1980's were a big influence on me as a kid.

It's rare that someone famous has had an impact on my life. When I was 11 years old, Thriller did, it directed my music tastes and got me through the 1983-84 season, which was one of Arsenal's worst.

Bad was released the same year that George Graham was appointed Arsenal's new manager. Graham brought the glory days back to Arsenal, something which I never thought could happen. But Graham has something in common with Michael Jackson. I held both in high esteem.

Then in 1993, Jackson was accused of child abuse and settled out of court. His aura was never the same and his music suffered.

In 1995, George Graham was fired by Arsenal for stealing 250,000 pounds from the club. His teams had become predictable, boring, and finished mid-table. Then in 1998 he became the manager of Spurs. I suddenly found myself hating a man that I once viewed as a legend.

I have never hated Michael Jackson. If anything I pitied him, especially after he was cleared of another child abuse allegation in June 2005. The man, who was once an idol for so many, was now a laughing stock.

It's a shame when that happens but people should never forget that Michael Jackson was a genius when it came to music.

RIP

Wrong Place, Wrong Time

I played against a guy named Ron when I was younger. Ron was the classic goal poacher. His was the lone goal in a championship final which my team lost as I watched from the bench with an ankle injury. I got sweet revenge the following year though as we returned the favor with a deserved 2-1 victory to dethrone the title holders. Ron and I eventually became good friends.

During his playing days, he dedicated himself to scoring goals when he was on the pitch but did very little to further that uncanny ability to do so with such ease and remarkable regularity when he was off it. To this day, I still ask myself what prevents people like Ron from doing more with their football abilities.

There have been many, many Rons throughout the world. Over the course of my lifetime alone there have probably been more than I can imagine. I suppose it's like anything else - right place right time and your life takes an entirely different turn. Ron could have been a fantastic player if he'd been from another time and place.

There have been exceptions however, when a player is spotted and ultimately reaches heights he'd otherwise not have done. There have been success stories that Ron could have starred in but for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. There have been super successful players who, like Ron, didn't possess the best technique but were practically peerless in front of goal.

Mario Jardel was one such player.

Were it not for Kevin Phillips - yes, THAT Kevin Phillips - Jardel would have been a three-time European Golden Boot winner. In three seasons, he led Europe's top goal scorers list (1998-99, 1999-00, 2001-02). Despite being the continent's top scorer on three separate occasions Jardel won the prize only twice. Phillips (then of Sunderland) won the coveted prize in 1999-00 because of the coefficients applied by the governing bodies. That simply means if Jardel scored 38 goals for Porto while Kevin Phillips scored 30 in the EPL, Phillips's feat is deemed more impressive because of the "standard" of play.

Jardel's prolific periods in the middle late '90s were as impressive as his disappearance from prominence was sudden and irreversible. While he seemed to always be where he needed to be when he needed to be there, on the pitch - a very underrated quality in football - Jardel never convinced the right people that he was much more than a free scoring player in the lesser leagues. He never played for Milan or Real Madrid or Bayern Munich. He's only ever been picked for the Selecao seven times with just one goal. That's hardly being taken seriously by either the big clubs in Europe or by any of the Brazilian national team's managers.

Jardel's decline even included a spell on the books at Bolton in 2003-04 as Walrus Face attempted to get a top scorer on the cheap. Ha! Not happenin' you big lard chewing bastid. Jardel appeared seven times for the shit kickers without a goal.

It was quite ironic to see a once prolific goal scorer - one who's timing had been so precise - at such a shambolic point of his career, playing in the wrong place at the wrong time and certainly for the wrong club.

Jose Antonio Reyes

Before the arrival of Andrey Arshavin, Jose Antonio Reyes was the record transfer signing for Arsenal Football Club. While the fee was never as high as the press consistently quotes (neither is Arshavin’s), he never achieved the heights that I’m sure Wenger once thought he might be able to reach.

When he arrived, he was immediately in the mix for playing time, even amongst the vaunted Invincibles squad. On the Arsenal Season Review dvd for that year, you can hear Reyes detailing a lengthy answer while the voiceover answer merely says “I love English football.” With his contributions to the squad, including a rocket shot goal against Chelsea, most were completely convinced that the fee would eventually end up being fully justified.

Everyone must now know that Wenger scouts players extensively. At the time, when he made that bid, he had to be sure Reyes would be worth the gamble. He had almost singlehandedly destroyed Real Madrid and had become an icon at a rising Sevilla team. Wenger thought he had signed a future star, and to be fair, that’s what he appeared to be for his first 12 months at Arsenal. Wenger stated:

“He has played for Sevilla up front on his own, as a supporting striker and he has played on the left recently. He can be adaptable; he can even play on the right. This player is an investment. He is 20 years old and he’s already an international.”

What exactly happened to a player that Wenger was so excited to get?

The facts have been recounted by many. The lack of protection from the refs, the constant hounding by Thierry Henry, his naive demeanor, and a brutal match against Manchester United are a few reasons.

Let’s look closer at some of these facts.

Reyes was the most fouled player in the Premier League. He was constantly hacked to bits, and considering that he had such a blazing start to his career, when a dip came, he struggled. I think this is one of the hardest things for a player to get used to when arriving in England. Quite simply, the idea of letting things slide in order to emphasize the English spirit is absolute crap. While people in England laugh over players getting injured and using defenses like “he got the ball,” the rest of the world shakes their head. Reyes was systematically taken apart by the Neville brothers, and not enough was done to protect him.

He was homesick. He had to take an interpreter to the video store in order to rent DVD’s. This indicates that he wasn’t ready to live by himself and maybe he never will be. It may contribute to the unhappiness of the player, and it may affect form drastically.

Last, people honestly believe that Thierry Henry played a great role in the demise of Jose Antonio Reyes. They believe that his constant sour attitude made Reyes wilt instead of blossom. After recently witnessing Kobe Bryant lead his team to the NBA Championship, it’s hard to put any sort of merit to this line of criticism.

As we stand today, Benfica refuses to pay 8 million euros to make the transfer from Atletico Madrid final. Reyes has helped Real Madrid win La Liga in dramatic fashion, and they didn’t want him.

The bottom line is, Reyes was not good enough. Paying large amounts of money never guarantees anything, even when scouted by a man as great as Wenger.

All of the reasons I’ve detailed for Reyes’ failure could have been overcome by a better player. There are hundreds of talented streetball players who could never make it in the NBA.

In our team, we need strong individuals. Reyes was never that.

ESPN Buys Setanta's Live Premiership Games

I'm not a fan of ESPN. It's the McDonald's of sports coverage. The analysis they give of games lasts 2 minutes and is interspersed with too many Heineken adverts. It's full of suited men talking too fast and not making much sense. In a nutshell, ESPN provides quickly digested, commercialized tosh.

And then there's Tommy Smyth, the Manchester United loving Irishman and his catch phrase:

"Put it in the onion bag."

I am an educated football fan who pays a cable company every month to get quality sports coverage from so called experts. Tommy Smyth is not an expert - he is a clown. It's because of this bald, bifocal wearing, leprechaun that I watch ESPN Champions League coverage with the sound off. Thank God ESPN will no longer have the rights to screen Champions League football.

Tommy Smyth's knowledge of the game was put to shame last summer by Judy Faudy. Who you might ask - and there lies my point. Isn't it time that this man was fired?

Comments like "Put it in the onion bag" belittles my intelligence and makes me question the quality of service that ESPN claims to provide. ESPN have anchor men who don't try and hide their ignorance and contempt towards "soccer". They would rather be working on college football, NASCAR or golf. Their ignorance and contempt for the game shows through while their voices sound dumber than a fraternity boy with a Pabst Blue Ribbon hangover.

To say that I am disappointed that ESPN has won rights to show live Premiership games is an understatement.

I thought that when Fox Soccer Channel won the rights to show next seasons Champions League games that that was the end of Tommy Smyth and ESPN with regards to "soccer". I obviously celebrated too soon.

Arsenal

Myles Palmer Is A Fraud

About three years ago, I contacted the blogger Myles Palmer. I'd reached a point when I could no longer resist asking the guy what his deal is.

I'd grown tired of reading about how his inside sources told him this or told him that. I'd grown tired of his predictions. I'd grown tired of the plies of horse shit he tries to pass as analysis of The World's Greatest Team.

"Arsenal need Maxi Lopez", he once said. Maxi Lopez!

MAXI LOPEZ!

How can I take someone who says that seriously? The final straw was his assertion that one has to live in London in order to be a Gooner.

His response to my email provided some insights on what he is about but nothing can change my view. The guy pretends to know more about Arsenal and certainly more about football than he really does.

A great man recently wrote about global brands. He noted how Arsenal has placed anchors in Asia and and other parts of the world as the club develops worldwide recruitment and commercial bases. The same great man is an ex-pat who was born and raised in London. He is an Arsenal fan.

Myles Palmer is not.

The same great man, according to Myles Palmer's mode of thinking, is no Longer eligible to be a Gooner as he has left London.

[I am not eligible to call myself a Gooner for I do not live in London, and I certainly wasn't born in London.]

Fortunately it doesn't matter where the great man lives, he has always been, will always be, and is a Gooner.

Myles Palmer is not.

The best way to avoid being irritated by the pompous know-it-all is simply to not read his blog. I just wish being rid of his type were as easy. Arsenal don't need Myles Palmer. My friend, the great man I've spoken about, and the millions of proper Gooners like him are who Arsenal need for their passion and unadulterated love for the club.

Myles Palmer is not.

The Agenda Against William Gallas Continues

Today, Arsenal conducted early business and signed Thomas Vermaelen. It has been stated, pretty much unanimously, amongst bloggers that nobody has seen all that much of Thomas Vermaelen. The popular clip that people have seen features Vermaelen scoring a header against Aston Villa. All we know about him are the facts. He is now officially listed as 6 ft tall, and he was bought by Arsene Wenger.

The key thing about his signing goes beyond just the fact that he's a defender. Most people have been pining for a defensive player to be bought, so desperate that people wanted Senderos back from AC Milan. The most intriguing piece of fact to me is the fact that Vermaelen is a left-sided central defender. For the last two years, William Gallas has been performing the task of being the left-sided central defender. Kolo Toure remained in his much more comfortable, especially for a right-footed player, position. This truth goes almost completely unnoticed by Arsenal fans. At Chelsea, Gallas actually had to play many times at left back. All this being said, Gallas's best position is in the right side of central defense.

After our Vermaelen signing and possible return of Senderos, the rumors of Manchester City hunting Kolo Toure have been revived. These rumors were based on truth. During the January transfer window, Toure submitted a transfer request, something that I refused to believe until it was later confirmed as true by both Wenger and Toure himself. This shocked me. The bloggers were split 50/50. Some were shocked that Toure would leave and thought he was quitting without showing much fight in trying to win back a starting role. Others interpreted it as Gallas being such a prat that a man like Toure, surely Arsenal through and through, wanted to leave.

Continue to today, and all the blogs are talking about the Kolo Toure/Manchester City link re-emerging. Nobody can really say why, but they all assume that William Gallas is the more likely to leave between the two. Why this is the conclusion, I have no idea. Maybe it's because Gallas hasn't said much since his injury. Or maybe it's because they cannot envision Gallas continuing with us after this past season.

Whatever it is, I'm willing to bet that Kolo Toure leaves before William Gallas does. That's not based on any sort of preference or bias. It has to do with the fact that there is a concrete link concerning Toure and that Gallas is still the best central defender we have at the club.

Global Brands

Drinking high gravity beer at high altitude is never a good idea. You get a killer hangover and act in a way that makes you embarrassed. That's unless you were in Denver last week with a bunch of coaches who have the personality of a polystyrene plate. I find a Weight Watchers commercial more interesting than those fucks.

That's right, I drank every day last week. It's the only way I could get through being in the same proximity as these plastic cone collectors.

I would turn up to coaching sessions - with my brain still feeling the effects of nuclear testing and my mouth as dry as sand paper - to be met by instructors who coached college. Not pro-teams, just college. Oh wait, there was Bob Gansler, the ex-Kansas City Wizards and US national team coach. In lectures, this old fart kept talking about Preki and Mo Johnston as if they were Carlos Alberto and Pele. They played MLS until they were 40 plus (Preki and Mo Johnston that is) so I really can't give a fuck about them Bob.

One night the NSCAA held a party for everyone. Beer and snacks were laid on but there was no disco ball or charlie in the toilets. At the "party" which had no music but instead played MLS DVDs on the big screen, I met some guy from The Rapids. We get talking and he tells me about Arsenal's link with the Rapids, how Wenger is trying to sign some 17 year old. He also told me that Steven Morrow, the ex-Arsenal and QPR midfielder - who recently got fired as FC Dallas head coach - is now working for the Gunners in the central America region. His official title is Performance Supervisor. He manages all of the international partnerships that Arsenal have around the world.

Who are these partnerships? Well, the Colorado Rapids is one partnership. Another two are BEC Tero of Thailand and Hoang Anh Gia Lai of Vietnam. There's Arsenal academies in Egypt and Ghana, with Mr. Morrow trying to set more up in Central America.

So what's the deal with these partnerships? Well, in Vietnam, Hoang Anh Gia are the main distributor of Arsenal merchandise in Southeast Asia. Arsenal run their academies and get first pick on any exciting players in the region. Ditto, Bec Tero, the Thai team, who have made significant changes to it's emblem and team jerseys so that they resemble Arsenal.

The Rapids guy told me that Everton are trying to make big strides in California. Chelsea donate hundreds and thousands of dollars to Capital Area Soccer League one of the largest and most successful youth soccer clubs in the US - based in North Carolina. Manchester United have a similar deal with another US club youth team, while Barcelona are still trying to buy Miami FC.

What we are witnessing my friends is the global race among big professional European clubs to spread their tentacles in an attempt to market their brand and to sign the best young talent. Helping them with this, are the sports manufacturers Adidas, Nike and Puma. Chelsea have summer camps in the US sponsored by Adidas. All MLS clothing is made by Adidas. NSCAA is also sponsored by Adidas.

Back in my day, RUN DMC wore Adidas and the Beastie Boys wore Puma. Times have changed. In 10 years time my beer will be Adidas. Fuck my deodrant already is.

Anyway, as the lame party became more lame, I found myself alone getting hammered. It was the only way I could face sharing a room with some guy who snores and who I don't know from Adam. So I waddled back to my student/prison accommodation, swiped my card which was around my neck and stumbled inside. I passed out on the kitchen floor only to wake up in the middle of the night to puke up in the tumble dryer. That went down well with my fellow "coaches" the next day.

I thought it was a fitting end to the evening.

Arsenal

It Gets Worse Every Year

If there’s ever been proof that Arsenal’s transfers are handled behind closed doors (the Tomas Rosicky bombshell notwithstanding – nobody saw that coming), it is this close season. As a great man has pointed out, speculation and outright lies abound concerning players coming and going. 

I feel it’s sad that “major” news outlets resort to such antics. Instead of being creative and offering reports and features that are credible, they manufacture stories that make them less credible by the day. 

I stopped taking the “news” that’s disseminated by so-called reputable sources seriously many years ago. Year in year out I am vindicated for having done so. The latest bit of dodgy information comes in a “leaked” copy of the first six fixtures of the 2009-10 season. Contrary to what had been stated on many blogs, we will not be playing West Ham the first game of the season. It has now emerged via a “draft” fixture list that Everton is our first opponent in August. We don’t play West Ham until late October.

Media Blackout

If in the month of June you never had access to NewsNow, that might be a good thing for you.

One moment, we're signing Thomas Vermaelen. The next, it's delayed.

One minute, Cesc said he would leave if Pep Guardiola asked him to. The next, he denies wanting to leave the club.

Clichy and Sagna were both linked with Real Madrid. The day after, they both vehemently denied wanting to leave.

Is it any wonder that newspapers are going out of business? Sadly enough, it's mostly American institutions that have been afflicted. Not worthless publications like The Mirror, The Daily Star, and The Sun.

As a great man I know says, I'll believe it when I see it on the Official Arsenal website. The very fact that we have players issuing denials on the official site (because of errant reporting) is an indication of how worthless the "news" has become.

I wish it was in my nature to shut myself completely off from Arsenal for a month, because surely this would be that month.

A Message To US/English "Soccer" Coaches

I hate English blokes that work as "soccer" coaches in America. They're the most arrogant fuck faces I've ever met.

Take this wank from some small city in the north of England. He's 24 years old, assistant coach at some crap, small, womens college in the Bible Belt. At the age of 10 he was signed by Nottingham Forest and played in the same youth team as Michael Dawson and Jermaine Jenas. He thinks that this gives him kudos - it does, but only by the same soccer moms and dads that gave Monica Lewinksky kudos for trying to end Bill Clinton's presidential career by sucking his cock and shoving his cigar up her fat vadge.

Mr. Northen England, you failed at Nottingham Forest, but unfortunately for the rest of the world you were offered a "soccer" scholarship at some Christian Never Heard Of It College in West Virginia. To get into this dump hole of an education establishment, which is funded by America's Christian Right, you had to be above average at soccer. You didn't have to take A-Levels or SAT's - that would have been too difficult for your tiny brain. Just farting, having an English accent and a good right foot would suffice.

Unfortunately, this waxed your ego, which has been huge ever since you walked into Nottingham Forest's academy. From that moment on you have built up a sense of entitlement. It goes like this:

I am Mr. Northern England. I played in the Nottingham Forest Youth Academy. This means that I'm better than you. In my grey, shitty, little English home town I suddenly became a big fish in a small pond among kids my own age. I was the best player in my neighbourhood. Ok, so I never made it at Nottingham Forest but I played college in the USA. They paid for my college education. That's like being a pro. Then after my college playing career was over, I was offered an assistant coaching position at a religous nut house college for girls. Immediately, I thought that I was Alex Fergurson. I ignored the truth. That I am getting paid fuck all to pick up cones and bibs after training and hand out water bottles to sweaty, below average, devout Christian girls, with fat arses on match day.

The truth is that if I was any good at playing, I would have made the MLS draft. I didn't, but that doesn't stop me from being arrogant and obnoxious. An example of this, is when I go to a bar where people are watching "soccer" games. When I walk through the door, I suddenly feel like a celebrity. That's because I think that I have more knowledge about "soccer" than those around me. I sneer and disregard anyone else's opinion on "soccer" even before they have told me their thoughts.

I'm English, I played with Jenas and Dawson. I've played against Jermainne Pennant. Now who else can say that? Hardly anyone.

Then last week, I go on this coaching course in Denver. There I meet other "soccer" coaches. Most are American's. I only talk to those who coach college. I don't bother talking to the high school or club coaches. They're beneath me.

There are one or two British guys on the course. One is this guy from London who I hated. He thought he was the bollocks because he dressed weird, read The Count of Monte Christo instead of taking notes during field sessions. One day this "bell end" (northern Englsih slang) fell asleep underneath the bench while everyone else was listening to instructors give practice sessions. For the first two days he never partcipated in any of the field sessions because he was too into his novel. Wanker! I had no respect for this man because he turned up on the first day with his wife dropping him for registration. What was he? A little boy being dropped off for summer camp by mummy? I asked him where he was from. He said London. I hate Londoners, mainly because they have a better sense of style than us northerners. They have better clubs, know how to hustle, chat and act better than people like me. I buss out my Stone Island gear, not realizing that only chavs and northern hooligans wear that. No decent club in London would allow me entry if I decked my self out in Stone Island garms. In Nottingham, they would.

My next question to him was which team he supported. He said Arsenal. I hate that team. I mean how many English players have they produced? Now look at the amount of English players that Nottingham Forest have produced. Twat!

Anyway, this weird London fuck who was 36 (12 years my senior), finally participated one day in the field sessions. He fucking roasted me. It was embarrassing because everyone thought that he no skill because he didn't dress like a coach. He coached in a Fubu sweat suit and read real literature instead of "soccer" coaching diagrams. My hatred for him went up ten fold. Every time he got the ball he went past me as if I was a cart horse. So I decided to blank him. After all I played with Michael Dawson and coach college.

It's fucks like Mr. Northern England who turn me off supporting England.

England are international football's Man United. If they win the World Cup, which I hope they never do, I will consider buying some rope and hanging myself from the rafters. English people still go on about 1966 in the same way that Republicans rave about the Reagan years. I hate them.

Unfortunately, there are plenty of people like Scott coaching in America. That's because they would get found out in a country like France or Brazil. France would be too challenging for them.

Fucks.

Keep it Arsenal

In the Spotlight

'Cesc Fabregas was also on the scoresheet with David Villa netting a fifth in front of a sparse crowd in the mining town of Rustenburg.'

A mate of mine recently trained with some "ex-pros". The 'yeah, I was on the books at 'Derby County' types. The type of guys who aren't ashamed to say things like, 'I've known John Terry since we were 16' - and say it in public. One such character crunched into my mate with what the idjit surely thought was a manly gesture. Luckily, my mate, a great man, was not injured.

I say this to lead into my main point today which is the Confederations Cup. I don't mind the idea in theory. I am not one who hates international football (quite the opposite) and the crowning of an inter-confederation champion at least sounds good. But when Spain are destroying New Zealand and my captain is part of the rout, I am afraid that some New Zealander who plays for XYZ F.C. in Over Here City, West of Somewhere, could go in hard and send our playmaker back to the treatment table. Cesc's participation in this tournament makes me very nervous.

But will it really matter if Pep comes calling?

Never Forget - Jens Eats, Fat Boy Sulks

Jens Lehmann will be remembered for a variety of deeds and misdeeds. His time with Arsenal ranged from unprecedented success as an Invincible to gaffs that caused Arsene to opt for understudy Manuel Almunia. Despite the mistakes and the extras, I have praised Jens.

The sad sight below however has not praised our former hero. I have fond memories of the pompous ass sulking over Lehmann 'blanking' him and his cousin Jamie Redknapp while dining in a London restaurant.

Surely Jens was just exercising restraint - a fork in either cousin's eye would've been a more Jens-like (and favourable) gesture.

Philippe Senderos

Some people like Senderos. Some people like him a lot. One popular blogger continues to champion Senderos in small ways, if only to spite William Gallas.

It has been talked about that Philippe will be on his way back to Arsenal next year. It is not because he wants to return to our club. In fact, when he initially moved on loan to AC Milan, he made it sound as though it was a clean break. A clean break is one where you praise your new team and essentially wave farewell to your old team. Things like that don't happen when you're only going on loan.

Some people have claimed that Senderos may be more comfortable in a league like Serie A, but from what I have seen this year, he hasn't improved very much at all. He's solid enough to make the bench, but that's what he is at this point, a bench player.

He has the physical tools to be an elite defender. He does read the game decently, and he is actually bigger than Nemanja Vidic. But after years of being punked by Drogba, he doesn't have it in him to take that next step. I'm certain of that.

If it turns out that he returns and he performs admirably for Arsenal, hooray for us. I'll apologize and say that he proved me (and a few others) wrong.

But as of right now, I'd flog him to any club willing to pay 4-5 million pounds for his promise and channel it into signing Mamadou Sakho, the youngest ever captain for Paris Saint-Germain FC.

So I am taking this "soccer" coaching course in Denver, Colorado.

It's a fucking nightmare.

For a start I have to share a room with some dude who snores. The last time I shared a room with another man was when I was 12 and that was with my brother. My brother probably wanted privacy so that he could wank in peace. I did notice that he started watching films like "The Bitch" starring Joan Collins once he had his own room.

The bloke in my room probably hates me being in that room, just I as much as I hate him being there. He probably can't wait to get back to wherever he came from - probably some suburban hole outside Kansas inhabited by soccer moms - and sleep in his own bed - because I certainly do. The room itself is very basic. My bed is a mattress with a pillow that was donated by the local hospital. The walls are yellow and plain. The room stinks of sweaty socks and soccer boots but you can't open the window for security reasons.

The course itself is ridiculous. Let's deal with what is being taught: Systems of play, phase play, shadowing, functional play - it's Pythagorean Theorem "soccer" meets mathematics formulas - and I say Fuck Off. But unfortunately I am surrounded by these English and American "soccer" coaches who practically suck this shit down their throats. God they think they're something special. Let's get a reality check on these wank fucks.

1. You coach an under 12 girls team in Nothingville, PA.
2. You're an Assistant coach at a Mickey Mouse Never Heard Of It College in the place where the "Children of the Corn" was filmed.
3. You will never coach a professional team - College teams don't count pal.

Every morning I wake up with my room mate in a college dorm or house or bungalow or should I say prison cell at 6:30 am. I get up first and don't bother looking at my room mate for obvious reasons. I then walk across this Two-Bob-Bit University campus that not even the people of Denver have heard of, to get breakfast. I am still wearing my jeans and jacket from the night before because I sleep in them every night - my room is cold as fuck. By this stage of the day I am a zombie. I need a piss, my hair looks like it's been microwaved and my clothes look like a crumpled up newspaper.

I hate walking across campus because I know that I am going to bump into some fuck on my course who has showered, wearing his shiny black Adidas track suit, a backpack with all of his notes and some snide Adidas sandals. This Mother F will eat breakfast and digest his "coaching in the game" notes while I will struggle to find my pass that will allow me in the cafeteria - only to realize that I left it back in my hell hole smelly, cold, room.

The food here is crap. Seven Eleven serves up a better breakfast. So missing breakfast is not a bad thing. Still I get back to my room. The bathroom is occupied with some toss taking a dump. It smells out the whole house. I therefore decide to get changed into my "coaching" gear and go to my first lecture which starts at a ridiculously early time. Who decides to have a lecture at 7.30 am?

The clowns that run US Soccer do, that's who.

Get me out of here - I am a Gooner.

Later

The Mundialito (Mini World Cup)

From 30 December, 1980 to 10 January, 1981, the Mundialito was played in Montevideo, Uruguay. My stepfather took me to watch the final live on closed circuit television. I was in heaven - seeing live matches back then was truly a spectacle. And to see Brazil was a special treat. It was my first time ever seeing them play live. I was raised to appreciate jogo bonito.

The Mundialito was a friendly tournament commemorating the 50th anniversary of the first World Cup tournament. The participants were Uruguay, Italy, West Germany, Brazil, Holland, and Argentina. Each nation were former World Cup winners save the 1974 and 1978 runners-up Holland who were participating instead of England. England had turned down the invitation to join the other winners.

Prior to the final, I was able to watch most of the tournament on tape delay. I watched with as much enthusiasm as I do Arsenal matches today. We're talking unadulterated joy my friends. I will never forget the feeling of privilege I experienced or the indescribable joy that raced through me just from the exposure to the greatest players of that era - everyone knows about Maradona and Rummenigge but less celebrated and certainly recognizable names like Felix Magath, Martin Jol, and Carlo Ancelotti were also among the players in Montevideo.

I have fond memories of Uruguayans Vanencio Ramos and Ruben Paz, Brazilians Tita, Luizinho, and little Edevaldo, Dutch twins Rene and Willy van de Kerkhof, German keeper Eike Immel and decathlete turned footballer Hans-Peter Briegel, the elegant Italian Giancarlo Antognoni and the pillar at the back Pietro Vierchowod, under-rated Argentines Ramon Diaz and Juan Barbas.

Sigh!

Dominoes

This transfer window is like a bunch of dominoes. The first one falls, the rest will follow suit.

The first major domino was Kaka. He reluctantly agreed to go to Real Madrid, because it would ultimately end up helping AC Milan through rough financial times. He didn't sound overjoyed to become a Madrid player, but regardless of that, Florentino Perez has gotten his man. This will now lead to multiple scenarios.

AC Milan was previously thought to have been interested in Emmanuel Adebayor. Flushed with Kaka money, they could make a run for him. Only now though, they have turned their eyes to Edin Dzeko, a man who was mooted as a potential successor to Adebayor. Dzeko's dream club is AC Milan, and I can't take any offense to him wanting to move there. When comparing the two seasons between Adebayor and Dzeko, AC Milan may just conclude that the latter is a better player. Fair play to them, but that essentially means we'll keep Adebayor. That means, Adebayor needs to dig in deep, prove to the Arsenal community that he's still one of the best strikers in the world. I believe this is fully possible. Let's not discount the huge goals he has scored in the past.

David Villa, Cristiano Ronaldo, Xabi Alonso, David Silva, these are some of the big names being bandied around the place. Which is perfectly fine with me, as we're conducting our business early. Vermaelen is an unknown quantity to most, but Martin Jol is said to be furious that Ajax has sold him. That brings a smile to most Gooners.

Now, if we can get another CB (even though it looks like Senderos may be headed back here, why would Milan want to keep this guy?), and Blaise Matuidi, I'll be more than satisfied.

Thomas Vermaelen

Defensive signings seem to be the talk of the day regarding Arsenal. The Ajax captain Vermaelen is reportedly on the verge of signing for Arsenal in a 10 million pound deal.

Like most Arsenal fans out there, I've never seen this man play. Here are 10 things you need to know about him:

1) He is 6 feet 1 inches. Taller than Carlos Puyol and Ivan Cordoba

2) He is a Scorpio. The symbol that symbolizes Scorpio is the scorpion - an intense little creature that has enough poison in it's tail to disable or kill a much larger opponent.

3) He has 21 caps for Belgium;

4) He has played 85 times for Ajax, scoring 6 goals and winning the 2006 Dutch cup;

5) He is from a small town called Kapellen, which is situated just outside of Antwerp. The population of Kapellen is very small only 26,000 inhabitants but it boasts a number of professional sportmen: Tom De Mul (Sevilla), Kevin Van Dessel (Roda JC), NBA basketball player Didier Llunger Mbenger (LA Lakers) and retired Olympic high jumper Christine Soetewey.

6) He is 23 years old. He will be 24 in November;

7) He has short hair;

8) His hair is dark;

9) He is white;

10) He is not married.

Hype, Hilarity, and Hope

For all the hype and expectation of Liverpool finally winning the Premiership, for the hilarity laced in chants by Liverpool fans after their 4-1 drubbing of Utd, for all the hope of Rafa finally putting Ferguson in his place, Liverpool have as much to show for their “resurgence” as Arsenal do from this past season – two empty hands and European football. Granted they will not have to start their Champions League campaign with qualifying rounds but you get my meaning.

There are reports that Liverpool FC cannot manage interest payments and might be forced to exercise one of three options:

‘Refinance, get new equity investors, or sell [the business] to somebody else who's prepared to absorb the debt and start from scratch.’

Those are the recommendations of Sean Hamil, from the University of London's Birkbeck Sport Business Centre.

I cannot help but wonder how The Negatives feel about one of the world’s fabled football clubs, indeed one of the most successful clubs in the history of English football, being in such a potentially grim state. I cannot help but wonder what the reaction would have been if Arsenal had succumbed to all the anxious if not frantic cries from fan and neutral alike to buy big names, to spend big cash on new players, only to have finished the season without a trophy – just like Liverpool. There’s really no guarantee that an alternate approach to ours would have made us more successful. It’s simply human nature to become distressed and overly expectant when your rivals have employed different methods that seem to put them in a better place than you are.

I’ve gone from very confrontational and always ready to argue with The Negatives, to adopting a ‘we’ll get the last laugh’ attitude. While signs are ominous for Liverpool’s financial state, I’ve yet to read anything suggesting that we are not meeting our financial obligations vis a vis Emirates Stadium. I am convinced that the key to prolonged success for our club is intertwined with the building of the stadium.

Liverpool’s owners are not passionate about football or the football club – if they are, I stand corrected – but are passionate about money. How else did they become so wealthy? If recent reports are true, the club is in serious trouble.
It is hit or miss whether or not Liverpool will meet the July 24 deadline to refinance their £350m debt. Again, I have not read anything suggesting that Arsenal cannot meet financial obligations vis a vis Emirates Stadium.

There are plenty of people who’d gladly swap Togo for Torres, Eboue for Kuyit, Denilson for Alonso, etc. But I would be willing to place good money on the majority of Liverpool fans wishing that they were meeting their financial obligations. If not then we’re not the only club with Negatives willing to sacrifice the club’s stability for short term gain.

Kyle Bartley - Youth Player of the Year

Since Jack Wilshere gets a lot of plaudits, let's focus on another youth player for a change. That's not to take away from Wilshere's performances this year (including his playmaking against Liverpool in the first leg of the FA Youth Cup Final), but Kyle Bartley has been awfully impressive for the Reserves and the Youth squads.

He has made 28 overall appearances for the Reserve/Youth teams, and the most appearances for the Reserve squad of any Arsenal player. For an 18 year old, that's an achievement.

He is tall, physical, and a commanding presence in the back. Alongside Havard Nordtveit and Gavin Hoyte, we finally have some young defenders who might break in to the first squad in a couple of years time. Taken from Bolton, Bartley has the tools to make it in the first team if he continues his improvement.

Alex Song - Player of the Year

The man on the left is my choice for Player of the Year. True, he didn't make the PFA Team of the Year. However, when Ryan Giggs is voted PFA Player of the Year having only started 12 games then you know my opinion of the PFA awards.

A Negative told me last week that Song is not better than Carrick or Fletcher in center midfield. He also informed me that Vidic and Ferdinand were better than Song at center-back. I asked if Carrick or Fletcher can play center-back. He said "probably not." I then asked him if Ferdinand or Vidic could play as good as Song in center midfield? He shook his head.

Ferdinand has played 14 years as a center-back. Give Song that amount of experience and I am sure you will see him make the PFA Team of the Year every season.

Song doesn't have the height of Carrick, Vidic, Ferdinand or Fletcher but still out jumps tall muscular strikers like Heskey or Agbonlahor. He has great timing in the tackle, he's also strong in the tackle and will never be bullied in a game. The Negatives hate his lazy, stoned look, and use it as a weapon for his exclusion from the team. His passing needs improvement but I am confident that it will. After all, his passing is better than what a lot of people give him credit for.

Certain games stand out where Song was outstanding. Both games at Old Trafford. His substitute appearence at White Hart Lane when Eboue was sent off. His Carling Cup performance against Wigan, where he made mincemeat of Emille Heskey.

Arsenal bought from Bastia for 1 million pounds. Today he is worth a lot more

Season Review Pt. II - Opinion

Top Three Factors That Contributed To Our Failure This Season

o Togo’s poor return – after a 30-goal performance and an improved contract, we expected more. I would not sell him though. A proven goal scorer deserves another year to sort himself out.
o The Gallas witch hunt – some feel that there was no witch hunt. There was. From criticism of almost every word the man spoke to edited photos of him ‘smoking’ an unlit cigarette, the climate was made difficult, at best.
o Defensive mistakes – key moments that defined our season were not in the offensive but the defensive third of the pitch.

The State of Our Club - Ownership and Direction

Unlike other bloggers, I do not claim to know more than I actually do. My sources are not mysterious individuals with close ties to the club. I read most of what the rest of the world read and make my own judgments on that basis.

Beyond players the club has changed dramatically from 36, 24, and even 12 months ago - Usmanov lurks as Kroenke ascends, Lady Nina, and Messers Fiszman and Edelman are either out or no longer hold the same positions of influence at the club, the debt on Emirates Stadium remains, and speculation about Board unrest and being less than forthright about club finances is common.

Those factors have largely reshaped the face of our club. That much I do know. Oh, and a special thank you very much to Tony Adams for adding to the speculation. Give me positive proof and I’ll be happy to rethink my position on certain issues. Speculation is useless to me. I need to see proof that the Board has been holding back the truth. I need to see more than just words spouted in anger by people with nothing but theories and opinions.

The specter of Uzbek billionaire Usmanov makes some fans very uncomfortable. Foreign ownership is generally unwanted. The fact that it could be in the form of the terribly unpopular Alisher Usmanov makes it all the worse. Yet there are those who wouldn’t mind if he took over the club and pumped it full of money – no matter how that money was procured.

Others feel if we’re going to be taken over at all, let it be by the more palatable American Stan Kroenke who has a proven pedigree with ownership of multiple franchises in the sports arena, save the recent double booking of pro wrestling and basketball playoffs on the same night. Interestingly however, the addition of Ivan Gazidis could make a bigger strategic difference than either mega-share holder does.

I am a proponent of the Wenger model. It might need some fine tuning but I am convinced that it is a sound approach. Gazidis seems competent and savvy enough to help massively in that department. With the stadium debt at a manageable level, the club is stable and can become more profitable and remain self-sustaining. That, my friends is what it’s all about – self-sustainability. If we can win things along the way it would be optimal.


What gives you hope going forward

I am dismayed at times by the impatience of Arsenal fans. It is one thing to prefer a different approach to the Wenger model. It is another thing entirely to deny that the young players are gaining invaluable experience. Tomorrow they will become those players that Wenger is criticized for not buying today.

I relish the fact that Kieran Gibbs is good enough to have been given such a level of responsibility that his mistake vs. United made so big a difference. He’ll be better for it. I look forward to the fruits of L’il Jack’s phased nurturing. Having had a taste of what’s ahead, he’ll be eager to get his chance at the top level. Alex Song has been the revelation we (at eighteen86) believed he’d be. Song has proven his quality and versatility. I firmly believe that there’s much more to come from him. Samir Nasri is a much better player than he’s shown this season. We have not seen him at his most effective.

It is always tricky to try predicting which young player will become a good pro. Having won the Youth League and the Youth Cup Final, this current crop provides Wenger with a healthy lot to choose from.

Andrei Arshavin will have a full pre-season and will be fully settled by September. That will make a major difference in how he performs next season. I can hardly wait to see him play with an in form Cesc and a fully fit Eduardo.

Eduardo will be ready for action next term. He makes a huge difference when healthy.
I believe that we have not been far away from winning something in either of the four years that are the source of Wenger’s bane. Talk of the current four-year drought is like the lyrics to that very popular but extremely annoying song that stays in my head for days.

Add two to three key players to a healthy squad and we will deliver. I am convinced of that.

What Keeps Me Up At Night

The recurrence of injuries to key players is always a source of worry for me. Injuries happen. They are part of the game. It just seems that they happen more often to our best payers than can be explained logically. The following have been out for extended and/or key periods in the past few seasons: Cesc, Eduardo, RvP, Gallas, Rosicky, Clichy, Sagna, Diaby, Theo, and Togo. Are we just unlucky? Are we targets? Are we doing something in training that makes us vulnerable in battle?

Players To Buy

When considering what our team may need, I've tried to pick out reasonable targets.  That means I won't write about how much I want Michael Essien to play for us.  Our squad has been lambasted by many as being too thin, but the fact of the matter is, other than one position in particular, we're well set up for the future.

These are the players I would love to see play for Arsenal next year.

Blaise Matuidi, DMF, AS Saint-Étienne:

Just as I was about to write about this player, it seems like there have been small rumors about Matuidi being linked with us.  This is not a big surprise, as we were looking into him about a year ago.  From what I've read, we've had Grimandi scout the player for a full year now.  Today, Arseblogger about him briefly, dubbing him the "New Black Flamini," something which I find to be offensive.  In fact, he has the potential to be far better.  Think Makelele with a touch of Pirlo.  Obviously, he's not that player now, but he has the upside to be much better than Lassana Diarra.  I was actually rooting for St. Etienne to go down, so we could have him for cheaper, but they managed to stay up.  He'll add much steel in midfield, a smart player and a good eye for distribution.  Alongside Alex Song, Matuidi would provide the ideal complement to Cesc.  And for those that complain about his short height, well he's the same height as Makelele and "Lass."  I want this guy now.

Cristian Zapata, CB, Udinese Calcio:

A 22-year old powerhouse.  Think Kolo Toure in the Invincibles team, but better and bigger.  I think it's time to replace Kolo Toure in the starting XI of Arsenal.  I love Kolo, but he's been on the wane for the last two years.  Zapata could not be a more perfect replacement for him.  He's got pace.  He's plying his trade in Italy, which is about the best blooding a player could have for defense.  He's good positionally.  He can use both feet, meaning he will be comfortable being fielded as a left CB, something Gallas has done as a soldier and been completely unrecognized for doing so.  It will take some cash to prize this guy away, but he's young and he can play for us for years.

Brede Hangeland, CB, Fulham FC, Gary Cahill, CB, Bolton Wanderers FC, Sebastien Bassong, CB, Newcastle United FC:

These three players would require no adaptation to the Premier League.  They are all 6 ft 2 inches or taller.  They are all probably overpriced.  But they would fill a great need in this Arsenal team.  They would be able to play the ball in the air and nullify the long ball tactics used by so many weaker teams against us.  All of them have their positives.  Hangeland played for the fourth best defense in the Premier League, and he's an elegant defender.  Gary Cahill has just been called up for the England team, is young, and is on the rise.  Bassong has just been relegated, meaning he'll want to leave Newcastle as soon as possible.  He was educated at Clairefontaine, and he's athletic.  Any of these three would do, I would take the one that would be cheapest, to be honest.

Ezequiel Garay, CB, CF Real Madrid:

This player is everything I've stated with the trio above, but he plays in La Liga.  He has not played a game for Real Madrid yet, as they bought him and immediately sent him back on loan to Racing Santander.  It is a pipe dream, and he would need time to adapt to the Premier League, but this guy is the big man I want in our defence.

Edin Dzeko, CF, VfL Wolfsburg:

If Adebayor is sold, this is the player who should replace him.  Along with Grafite and Misimovic, this trio set the Bundesliga (an underrated league) ablaze this year.  A historic triumph, Dzeko scored 26 goals in 32 games.  He is a great link up man, very good in the air, and classy.  People have referred to him as the Bosnian Marco van Basten.  He's as tall as Adebayor, so any of the variation in our football that came as a positive when Adebayor played would not be lost.  Simply put, he can be one of the best strikers in the world.

Players That Need To Go

Philippe Senderos:
Some pundits and fans said that Pascal Cygan was bad. Well Philippe, he was better than you. He was slow, you are slow. But Pascal was better at reading a game and his timing was a lot better. You had the advantage of working your way through Arsenal's academy and reserves. Fans like a so called home-grown player, except you were not home-grown. You were a very young transfer signing, which has escaped the memories of certain Gooners. You went on loan for a reason. You failed on loan and therefore you need to be sold. You had one good season with Arsenal but that was in the Champions League games of 2006. Cyndi Lauper had a good hit with "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" after that she faded away like an old fart. I expect the same will happen with you Philippe.

Mikael Sylvestre:
You have been unfairly criticized. You were bought as back up and you accepted that role with dignity. You have one year left on your contract. I suspect that financially you would like to see out that contract rather than move away to a club that is struggling and suffer a drop in wages. You could be a good influence on some of the younger players at the club. However, Arsenal need a younger, top quality, center-back. You are not that man. If we sign this player then I think you should move on. Of course, you will be allowed to leave on a free and with the best wishes of Arsenal Football Club.

Amaury Bischoff:
Your injuries seemed to have cleared up. I hope that you had a great experience at Arsenal because your contract is up and it will not be renewed. Andrei Arshavin and Jack Wilshire have put paid to that. However, I'm sure that you will find a new club.

Emmanuel Adebayor:
How many goals did you score this season? How much are you getting paid from your new contract? This seaon you have been average. You cause controversy with your claims that AC Milan and Barcelona want to sign you. For 24 million pounds you can go. If you had the humility of Eduardo you could go far but you don't and never will.

The Jury Is Out On The Following
Kolo Toure
Tomas Rosicky
Armand Traore