Saturday, July 31, 2010

Arsene Speaks


Arsene's post match comments were telling. He has said what I have been thinking for weeks. Cesc must make it clear that he is at Arsenal and end the madness.

That alone won't make Barcelona or Barcelona's players stop making annoying comments about our captain but it will go a long way to help us all move along, even if only temporarily. Arsene has been fed up with all the chatter but what can he do? "There are a lot of things I don't master in football and the rumours are one of these things." He went on to address the tapping up question as well, "They [Barcelona] certainly have a case to answer but it is always the same - how can you prove it?"

So the door remains open for the player to set the record straight. "Cesc has five years to go and that is it...Who can stop the speculation? Only Cesc maybe, I don't know, maybe not even Cesc." Quite unsettling!

Common sense says that Xavi, Puyol, and Lerch (with his fucking US navy style buzz cut) should realize that they cannot afford the player. Until such time - and even then there's no guarantee that we'll sell - you'd think that they'd go about their business. You'd think that they'd be more worried about the upcoming campaign. Jose Mourinho is not an ordinary manager.

I used to have time for Barcelona. Some great players have worn their colors. They are Real Madrid's bitter, bitter rival, a status that would endear almost any club to me but that doesn't make up for acting low-rent and classless.

In other news...

Wilshere's football instincts were glaring yesterday.
The new signings looked comfortable.
Eboue is to be respected - if Sagna goes down with injury, I won't fret.
There were no injuries, not that I've seen reported anyway.
Wilshere/Frimpong got good experience against Seedorf/Gattuso.
Randall may have given Arsene the green light for a permanent loan.

I was exchanging thoughts with Supah Strikah after the match. He felt that Fabianski might have done better on Pato's goal. He felt that he didn't take charge. I commented that it might be harsh to blame him yet I understand the sentiment very well. Let's be clear. When ever a goal is scored against us, as long as those two clowns are in the nets we will always feel that they could/should have done better. That's the kind of reputation and support they've earned.

Interestingly, Arsene made this point about the goal, "You can't fault him [Fabianski] for the goal and he did everything else well. The only thing is there wasn't much command on the free kick. From outside it looked like no-one took charge of the organisation and that's a little bit down to goalkeeper." I would add that organisation is also a captain's job. And it was a bit disappointing to see the taller Djourou mis-time his header and then Vermaelen (captain for the day) beaten to the ball by the admitedlly dangerous Alexandre Pato. Vermaelen can and will do better. Djourou? I'm not so sure.

A fellow Gooner reminded me that he predicted Chamakh would "hit the ground running". He seems to be settling in nicely. I need to see that, as my confidence is beginning to wane after years of supporting this group unequivocally. The addition of an effective striker is a good thing. Big ups Yardie! You're right so far.

I just had a vision of Chamakh going nuts when we play Scum, making their shit stadium what Arshavin has done with Anfield. Hopefully our new striker will continue where Bob left off and score against _pur_ for fun, where ever we play them. Having 'almost signed Rivaldo' once, now they can claim the same about Luis Fabiano. To compensate for losing out on another Brazilian, Harry Redknapp has bought Anapka, which is a bit baffling. Why do you need another donkey when you've got Dawson and King?

So we wait on additional signings as time ticks away. All is not doom and gloom but I'd be really happy if Arsene plugged a few gaping holes. El Cunto said he'd take Friedl. I would too.

Celtic today! The Boss says he'll play his best side. Oxymoronic since Clown No. 1 will be in goal.

Chat later,
Agent 86

Friday, July 30, 2010

No Surprises

- We've been prepared for this moment ever since Cesc burst onto the scene and announced himself as a super prospect when he started playing alongside Patrick Vieira in 2004. I had heard a story that before Cesc signed for us at the age of 16 that he begged Barcelona for an opportunity to prove himself and his pleas were rebuffed. Now, I don't know if that story is true or not, but I don't remember Barcelona pitching much of a fit when we initially signed him. It's only after his cerebral brain proved to be old enough to play in one of the top leagues in the world at the age of 18 that Barcelona claimed outrage. Regardless, the fact that Cesc would want to return to Barcelona was never up for debate, it was a matter of when.

- Hopeful Gooners wished upon a star that he would stay until he was 30. Most Gooners might have imagined him leaving to replace an aging Xavi. Pessimistic Gooners thought the date was right around the corner. Having just watched the Arsenal Season Review of last year, the last couple of months probably made Cesc more anxious to leave than ever.

- Consider what happened. We were destroyed by Messi in the Champions League. Fabianski singlehandedly exploded a grenade in our face. Barcelona repeated in La Liga. Spain won the World Cup. Pique and Puyol whispered sweet nothings into his ear for the last three months.

- On a complete side note, the subject of Cesc's controversial transfer when he arrived at Arsenal was not controversial at all. In England, anybody aged 16 can sign a professional contract with anybody they want. Not all of Barcelona's famed players come through La Masia at a young age. Puyol was 17 when he joined, Busquets was 17 when he joined, Pedro was 17 when he joined, Jeffren was 16 when he joined, and Messi was 11 when he joined but from a foreign country and mainly came over to enjoy human growth hormone treatment. There's nothing wrong with this at all, but what is the difference with what we did with Cesc and what Barcelona did with those players? Nothing. So, when they claim that Cesc isn't worth more than 35 million pounds because they reared him, it's code talk for "we're broke".

- My colleague stated that he wasn't bothered about Barcelona players talking about their desire for Cesc to join Barcelona. I'd agree with most of that, but I don't appreciate it when the line is crossed. For me, the line gets crossed when Puyol starts to almost refer to Arsenal as a "prison" and when Xavi says Cesc "deserves better than Arsenal". The people of New Orleans deserved better. Cesc is being paid 90,000 pounds a week and plays for one of the most glamorous sides in Europe. I don't mind them talking all the time, but it feels like a systematic ploy to drive the price down. Talk about Cesc all you want, just don't slander our club. Puyol claims we should "show more class". Well, Wenger said he wouldn't complain about Barcelona's constant stream of Cesc foreplay, classy enough for you? They must all have their separate days in which one of their teammates will talk about Cesc. Keep talking, it's not as if Wenger is listening.

- Perhaps the thing that really bothers me is that there's clearly truth behind these words. Cesc does want to leave. There's no doubting that. His respect for Wenger and the fans are what's preventing him from going even more public or handing in a transfer request. All we had heard from Cesc is that he had a conversation with Wenger that was one of the hardest things he's ever had to go through. We can infer all we like, but Wenger is not talking about it. Instead, Arsene is adamant that he'll stay. Taggart did this two years ago with Cristiano Ronaldo.

- My colleague has also raised the point that this saga has done harm to our team. He's asked whether or not Cesc will be fully committed and whether or not the other players will fully trust him. It's a valid thing to consider, but I think once Cesc knows he's going to stay for the year, he'll buck up and give it his all. He's a true professional and he's not going to sulk; he simply respects Arsenal too much. Kobe Bryant requested a trade from the Lakers a few years ago. In his first game, he was booed at Staples. Regardless of that, he played to his full capacity and the team performed so well that he rescinded his trade request and started a run of three consecutive Finals runs culminating in back to back Championships. That saga tested me fully as a sports fan, because that was the same summer that Henry left Arsenal. When the word circulated that Cesc wanted out, I wasn't pleased, but I wasn't crushed.

- As much as we do not want to have an unsettled player on our squad, what is most important to me is establishing a hard line of negotiation. Quite simply, we hold all the cards and Barcelona knows it. Take a club like Lyon for example. Jean-Michel Aulas is amongst the best transfer operators in the business. He extracted 26 million pounds for Michael Essien and 26 million euros for Diarra. Both players stated that they wanted to leave and he still got those fees. To accept anything less than 50 million pounds is an insult. There are only a handful of players who have a higher transfer value than Cesc Fabregas. I do not mind him leaving, but I do mind him leaving for less than he's worth.

- If that doesn't happen this summer, then it'll happen next summer. Something inside me (and this 100% pure speculation) thinks that this may Wenger's final season. That's not to suggest the board will fire him. It's also not to suggest that if he wins, he'll come back. I just have a feeling that he wants to have his squad together to mount a challenge for the Premier League and the Champions League and that's why he's desperate to hold onto Cesc. Let me repeat that I'm just making a guess and that I hope he'll stay for many more years. But if that was the case, it would signal his intention to go out with a bang.

- Either way, this whole Cesc saga has been a chore. What I know is this. If we don't get proper value for Cesc, it's bad for the club. If we sell him for the proper amount, we can replace Cesc (Ozil and Hazard come to mind, not on a one for one basis, but just talented players who are out there). If we keep him for another year, I know that Cesc will be as committed and will want to go to Barcelona with a Premier League medal in his wardrobe; that'll have to be good enough for now.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Atlanta

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Wednesday, July 28, 2010

El Cunto the Promoter and the Debut of Conversations With Dante



The Informer has not retired. I sense that he’s not far away, refining his methods, bullying his sauces to get it right, wiping that dried yolk off his handsome face. Trust me. He’ll be back bigger, better, stronger.

Meanwhile, his alter-ego El Cunto is trying his hand at promoting. I began training Monday night for the NYC North London Derby. The herniated discs, pinched nerve, and tendonitis will not stop me playing in this match. If I have any semblance of fitness, I will suit up. It’s that important. Even if I play just ten minutes, I’ll be happy.

We’ll see if I can find enough straps and braces to make a difference. Youth is wasted on the young. Xbox playing, phone text addicted, Facebook junkie little cunts!

The little voice inside my head is saying to forget about playing and go on living relatively pain free. It’s probably right but if this match does happen and is anything like the last time I joined El Cunto for a game, it will be memorable. Two years ago, he organized a 5-a-side that I played in. The temperature was hotter than I’ve ever experienced on a pitch, seriously. Definitely not football weather! To make matters worse, the opposition had three subs for the two 20-minute halves. We had no subs. Nevertheless, despite being down something like 8-2 at Half Time it turned out to be one of the best experiences of my entire life.

El Cunto was nutmegged by some ponytail wearing cnut in the First Half. I could hear the 1886 man, “Oh, It’s like that!?!?” He was not pleased. A Half Time chat, some rehydrating, and a nice breather helped us refocus. El Cunto ran the show. I got stuck in on the ponytail wearing forward – his threat died like a candle blown in the wind but I have to give it to him, he was a decent player.

We pressed on and equalized. El Cunto was on fire. They capitulated. We wound up winning 15-10.

If this NYC North London Derby does happen, put your money on him to shine. And the Bermuda boys are eager to play so it should be fun if nothing else. Me on the other hand, well, just make sure EMTs are on call nearby.

Dante and I chatted the other day. He, like most Arsenal fans these days, has much to say about the current squad. Here are a few samplings from the conversation:

Agent 86: What has stood out for you so far this pre-season?

Dante: Arshavin gets it, after being blasted by an 18 y/o midfielder (Wilshere) for not getting back and doing his part I have seen a slight change in him.

Agent 86: I expect to see serious changes this season where he’s concerned. He owes us. He can be our Messi. I really believe he can be as good as any player in the game today if he puts his mind to it. I suppose it’s about motivation with him. I can’t hide how disappointed I’ve been. I thought we signed a legitimate world star, a football genius.

Dante: Against SK Sturm Graz I watched him point and speak to players about where to be when defending rather than trudging back on the wing head down. This ever so slight change if continued throughout the season could help to ease pressure on the back four.

Agent 86: I agree. There are times when all a defender needs is that little bit extra from a forward or a midfielder to get into a position that changes the opposition’s point of attack and kills a threat. It can be that added effort that gets us a result. Think back to Denilson’s jog back as Rooney and Nani broke away at The Emirates last season.

Switching gears, I‘ve noticed that Frimpong has gotten some very good reviews so far.

Dante: Wilshire/Frimpong instill fear! Not only to opposing pre-season teams but to my delight, in our own players. Our experienced midfielders know Jack is coming, Frimpong is coming, and if it hadn't been for [insert any number of expletives that equal Northern troglodyte masking as a footballer in a candy-striped top], Ramsey would have arrived! Knowing that these Young Guns could replace you like for like in a game helps to remove complacency from the equation.

Agent 86: Well put! Wenger recently mentioned how you can’t be a top flight footballer without the expectation of having to compete for your place. That as much as anything needs to be addressed. We should have players who’ve experienced competition for places long enough by now. In the recent past, we haven’t had that ‘fear of losing your place’ factor playing in our favor. In fact, it’s time to just stop the general excuse that we are not experienced enough. Even our youngest squad players have gone out on loan and know what’s required of them.

Dante: All the pundits keep on harping on experience, all experience is (these are my [Dante’s] own words not quoted from anyone) is "knowing what you are up against and not fearing it". Some players in our squad should take a lesson from Mr. Wilshere and Mr. Frimpong.

The conversation moved along swimmingly but we returned to ‘Arshavin the salesman’:

Dante: I think the thing that will make Arshavin into an unstoppable machine is something simple, A FRIEND!!

At that point, I wandered away in thought. Wow! Could this be the key to sparking our Ruskii genii into action? The idea intrigued me.

Dante: He needs another Russian who is not a female or a pig - as we all know he hates them. He knows Clown 1 is on his way out. Everyone on the squad knows this. That’s why he has never featured*. Arshavin is about himself but when he sees that he can help himself and help the team he is in hence; "I have spoken with Arshavin about Arsenal and London life. He has only had good things to say about the club and the city. He said some very nice things about me going on to be the best goalkeeper in the world - and that he would like me to reach that goal at Arsenal with him."

Agent 86: I hear you! And if the woman doubles as a pig, keep her from him at any cost. Seriously speaking though, I know that at least one of my colleagues at 1886 has expressed less than positive thoughts on signing Akinfeev but I’m willing to pay for his first 20 minutes’ wages if we sign him. I’d pay the entire first week but with economy and all…

[Clearly not moved by my pathetic attempts at humour] Dante: I watched some of the MLS vs. "The giants of Europe" such as Man City, _pur_, and Manure. _pur_ will always look bad even if they win 100-0. Thierry did the business again against them on his debut. City looked pathetic and didn’t win a game the whole tour, and United lost to 10-man Kansas City. Now everyone will say, "Oh it's just pre-season and the stars were not playing."

Berbatov, Gibson, Giggs, Scholes, Fabio, Rafael, Nani, Welbeck, Macheda, Diouf, Evans, if you know who these players are then SHUT UP!!! STOP CRYING!!!

Agent 86: Cheers Dante! We’ll catch up with you real soon. I’ll work on the jokes if I have time after training for the derby. I promise. Buy the rest of the boys in Bermuda a round for me.

Finally, I found this bit by Arsene interesting:

"Djourou has a small hamstring problem but it is not bad. He should be available for the weekend. Rosicky had a small, small alert. He was supposed to play in the first half but he could have played. I didn't want to take the gamble, it is only a little problem on his groin and I decided to replace him."

It reminded me of when a very cynical Gooner (a guy we all at 1886 have butted heads with) once said that Wenger rushes players back from injury. He has far, far fewer sauces than The Informer (who at least can be entertaining) yet was convinced that Wenger was his own players’ worst enemy in that he will make them play while not 100% fit.

I wondered if there has ever been any truth to that when I read the quote above, which clearly shows that Arsene will err on the side of caution.

Chat later!
* Clown no. 1 started the match against SC Neusiedl 1919. Hopefully it will be his last start in our uniform.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Breezy Austria

- What can we really tell from these pre-season fixtures against lightweight Austrian opposition? This isn't to slight our opposition or our approach to pre-season. I'd argue that the matches are good for building stamina levels, but the training is what is actually most important.

- Tonight we faced Neusiedl 1919 and never got out of second gear. What did we learn today?

- Carlos Vela really loves to score chipped goals. In fact, I'd argue that 75% of his goals for Arsenal have been off chips.

- Johan Djourou went off injured in the first half. He was not limping badly, so it might have been precautionary. He spent all of last year recovering from an injury. Sol Campbell is heavily rumored to be signing with Newcastle. That leaves us with three regular CB's (four if you count Alex Song, which I'd rather not). We need to sign defenders. People may be happy to be rid of Gallas, but I'd kill to have him back on the squad. With van Persie given the No. 10 jersey, that's not going to happen.

- Which naturally leads to Koscielny. He is what every Arsenal blogger has pointed out; he has a slight build. But we can't really tell anything in these games. We're not facing class opposition, he doesn't have much to worry about, any lapses could be due to sheer boredom (even if that's unprofessional). Point blank, we're not to learn enough about Koscielny until we see him in the Premier League.

- Wilshere and Emmanuel-Thomas continue to impress. Wilshere's deft touch is a sign of true skill. Emmanuel-Thomas is a battering ram up front and is an alternative to both Bendtner and Chamakh. Emmanuel Frimpong is also making a case that he's moved up in the queue past Craig Eastmond. Frimpong's assured defensive shield duty was noticeable, he snapped into tackles and chased until he won the ball back.

- Manuel Almunia finally started in goal. Vito Mannone saved a tame penalty.

- Nasri is pulling all of the strings in midfield right now, but Cesc is taking a holiday in Spain hearing sweet nothings from his best friend Gerard Pique.

- The Emirates Cup is very soon, we'll learn more then.

Monday, July 26, 2010

The NYC North London Derby

So I'm trying to organize a 5-a-side match in New York against the NYC Spurs Supporters Club. They hang out at Floyds in Brooklyn next door to the Chip Shop which is an Arsenal bar.

The match - 1886 v NYC Spuds would be a first in America and if popular would attract interest and attention from Gooners around the world.

The ideal time to play this match would be either when the real North London derby is taking place or on a U.S. public holiday - like Labor Day.

Players of 1886 would be representing Arsenal fans of New York.

So far we have three players.

We need a keeper.

All players must be Arsenal fans. Your nationality doesn't come into the equation.

We will be wearing the traditional red Arsenal tops.

A trophy will be awarded to the winning team.

Bermuda Boys - are you in?

Keep it Arsenal

El Cunto

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Random Musings and A Tribute to Thierrence


Jay Emmanuel-Thomas and Emmanuel Frimpong look like they are progressing but we really haven't played anybody of note this pre-season. It's still nice to see though. And of course we all want to see Lil' Jack remind the world that despite everything, England (Arsenal) does produce skillful players.

Ricardo Carvalho has called Jose Mourinho "the best manager in the history of football". Can he win a few international tournaments first before we say that? Clearly Carvalho is eager to join Jose at Real Madrid. I am eager for us to face them in the Champions League at some stage. I would love to see Wenger thrash The Special One.

Yaya Toure has joined Manchester City for footballing reasons. And if Kolo were at United and they were swimming in money, he'd probably join them for "footballing reasons" too. This is a good chance for me to reiterate that you couldn't get me to join Manchester Fucking United for anything - well, perhaps to save my nine year-old nephew if that's what it came down to but for nothing else. Besides, they don't need another crocked, old defender with a dodgy memory. They already have the absent-minded hoover.

Eduardo has left for a new challenge. Some people might argue that he has already faced the ultimate challenge after nice guy Tiny so uncharacteristically put in a (perfectly fair) challenge that just happened to threaten the native Brazilian's career. As El Cunto has said, it is a shame we never got to see Eduardo's best at Arsenal. Thank you very much English football. Take a good long look at the entire saga and you will find some helpful clues on the things that hurt the game in England.

Laurent Blanc has suspended the French players in response to their protest against the real "best manager in the history of football", Raymond Domenech. As I understand it, he is still unemployed. I would recommend him highly to any English club that doesn't already have a French manager.

Not to take any arm in arm solidarity stance with Chelsea and _pur_ but via Top Four Club membership, football has migrated south. Fuck off Stoke and the rest of you Northern cunts. Ooooh, I can barely wait to face you poor excuses for footballers.

France and England drew 1-1 at the U19 UEFA Championships Saturday. Coquelin came on for Sunu on 73. Tom Cruise played the entire match for England. Both teams are in the last four. England face Spain as France take on Croatia Tuesday.

A few people I've spoken to seem to feel that I have been harsh on Thierry Henry. Quite the opposite. He is a legend and will always be one. The man has made more happy moments for me than any athlete that I can think of.

THAT is saying loads.

He just doesn't wear the Arsenal uniform any more hence he is off my radar. Besides, he plays in a league I do not follow. I did like this quote, "Whatever it is I want to come back [to Arsenal], maybe as a waterboy, I just love this club".

Wicked!

Friday, July 23, 2010

Nasri Is Ready

- Nasri's World Cup omission worked out for the best. He wasn't involved with the French debacle, which also means he's a guarantee to be called up after Blanc axed the entire squad for one match. He took the omission personally, and he's bulked up quite a bit.

- When we signed Samir Nasri, I was honestly shocked. It wasn't cause I doubted his natural ability or thought he was a bad signing. It's just that Arsenal are linked with young prospects so frequently that it was quite surprising that we actually signed one. Think about all the names that Arsenal are loosely linked with, mainly for the fact that we're viewed as a club that gives young players opportunities.

- Nasri's first season showed promise, but shunted out to the left wing, it was mostly a season of adjustment.

- Nasri's next season started on a bad note when he broke his fibula during training. He sparkled sometimes (against Porto) and inconsistent at other times. When Cesc went down with the injury that finished his season, he was handed the keys to our midfield and didn't do enough in my opinion.

- In this preseason, he's been Arsenal's best performer. He has a chip on his shoulder, and he better. I believe Nasri's best position would be to play foil to Cesc Fabregas in the centre of midfield. This will be a big season, and he looks to be up for it.

- One can only hope that Theo has that same burning desire. To be fair, I've seen more from Theo, but it's still not enough. But preseason has just started, it's time to crank things up a bit.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Andrei Arshavin

Some Gooners at the end of last season wanted Arsenal to sell Andrei Arshavin. Their argument was that it was better to sell now before his stock falls. What was their reasoning?

One good game in four isn't good enough for one of Arsenal's high profile and experienced players. They wanted to find a player who was more consistent. A player with a higher work rate and better attitude. Many Gooners didn't like the fact that Arshavin was using his personal website to voice his concerns on controversial subjects relating to his Arsenal career.

The fact that he said that he has always wanted to play for Barcelona at a time when the Spanish champions were openly and illegally trying to sign the Arsenal captain Cesc Fabregas, was one of many comments by the Russian that irked Gooners around the world.

It's like telling your girlfriend that you think her friend is sexy.

My problem with Arshavin is his work rate. The man has a weakness - its tracking back and helping your team out by defending and winning the ball back. Then there's his lazy attitude that suddenly appeared in the second half of last season. The West Ham game at home last March was a prime example of this.

Arsenal were chasing for the title. After five minutes Denilson puts Arsenal 1-0 up. Just before half-time Vermaelen gets harshly sent-off for tangling with the Mexican Franco. West Ham came out in the second half pumped up and ready to test Arsenal's 10 men. They were after all fighting against relegation.

Song put in a man of the match of performance. Cesc rallied the troops. Arshavin disappeared.

During the recent pre-season friendly against Barnet, I noticed Jack Wilshire berating Arshavin for not covering or tracking back. Two minutes later, the ex-St. Petersburg player cracked shot against the Barnet bar with barely any back lift.

Those two minutes said everything about Arshavin. Here's a man who can conjure up a moment of magic out of nothing but who is also not willing to graft for the team.

Against Barnet, Arshavin was voted Man of the Match by Arsenal.com subscribers even though he only played half a game. Against Sturm Graz on Wednesday, Arshavin went missing again.

Rumors are abound that the Russian play maker will be offered a new improved contract by Arsenal.

Perhaps this might inject some work rate into his game. If it doesn't, Jack Wilshire is waiting - biting at the leash.

Keep it Arsenal

El Cunto

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

News? Really?


I apologize for picking on you Mr. Henderson but you’ve presented a good case for the point I’d like to make. Maybe Wickham will join Arsenal at some point, we shall see. Nevertheless, here is a classic example of what I mean when I say “news” stories are often not:

By Mel Henderson
15th July 2010

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1294916/Arsenal-Tottenham-set-8m-battle-Ipswich-striker-Connor-Wickham.html?

MH: Arsenal are ready to take on bitter rivals Tottenham in a bidding war for rising Ipswich star Connor Wickham.
Me: Where does this come from? Has someone at Arsenal revealed that they are ready to do this? If so, why has Henderson been told?

MH: Spurs, who have already had a £5million offer rejected, have upped their bid to £8m and are willing to loan the prodigious 17-year-old back to the Tractor Boys next season.
Me: Fuck _pur_!

MH: But Gunners’ boss Arsene Wenger is also a big fan of Wickham, whose goals saw England crowned European Under 17 champions in May.
Me: Again, how does Henderson know who Wenger is a big fan of? It would help if you printed the quote where Arsene is stating that he is a fan of the player.

MH: Wickham netted both goals in the semi-final win over France and then the winner against Spain in the final, following up his three goals in four games for Ipswich the previous month.
Me: Oh? Maybe Fabio should have taken him to S. Africa. He may be good but those goals were scored against a handful of kids who might not even be in football in five years – some will become accountants or pimps or altar boys or journalists or drunks or rappers.

MH: Wenger is desperate to add firepower to his attack and does not want to lose out on Wickham, especially to Spurs.
Me: Wenger "is desperate to add firepower to his attack”? Even when his publically stated, no. 1 priority is to add a defensive player? Even after he has already bought a striker? Maybe I’m thick but the math doesn’t add up. And the bit about losing out “on Wickham, especially to Spurs”. How gratuitous can you get!?!? An Arsenal manager who doesn’t want to lose out to _pur_? Really???

MH: Hard-up Ipswich, whose latest accounts will reveal a debt close to £50m, are under pressure to sell.
Me: I dare him to call Ipswich “hard-up” with Roy Keane in the room.

MH: They have not made any signings this summer and boss Roy Keane has transfer-listed eight senior stars [stars???] in an attempt to raise much-needed funds.
Me: Maybe they really are cash-starved but he probably put them on the transfer list because they’re fucking soft. This is Roy Keane we’re talking about. It should never surprise you if he puts a player on the transfer list.

MH: But he knows that only by cashing in on Wickham will he be able to target the reinforcements required to turn the Tractor Boys into promotion challengers.
Me: Henderson says, “only by cashing in on Wickham will he be able to target the reinforcements”. Well what if some rich Russian does a Roman? What then?

And a reply from the Supah Striker down in Bermie:

The sad thing is that this guy thinks he wrote a wonderful article. All those rags in the UK hide behind the bullsh*t of “can’t reveal my source” in order to cover up the fact that their stories are purely fictional trash. He’s a two-bit clown that read some pathetic story in another rival heap of sh*t paper and thought “oh goodie, here’s some juice! I can use this!” he slurps down his juice and coughs up this rubbish. It’s really quite easy. I could get a couple of facts in 30 seconds on the internet (Wickham scored goals in these games over this time period and he’s 17). Now I take a known fact (Arsenal – Spurs animosity) and chuck in Keane given his former club’s poor relationship with Wenger, a few grainy pictures of my nephew to pass off as so called Wickham in training as a prodigious youth and BLAM! I’m a magician – just filled out a whole page for the paper in 10 minutes flat. I then sign it “Cunt” and I’m a rag star celebrity. That’s my route to the top. The guy’s a loser and was 100% definitely bullied by even the softest pansies in the playground. If I saw him today, I’d just take his lunch and walk away laughing.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Implicit Assessment

- The players who were taken to Austria for the intensive pre-season training were listed today on Arsenal.com.

- The players who are left behind are usually considered too young or that they're not quite good enough for Arsenal. There are a few names amongst the omissions that are interesting.

- Jay Simpson - He's done okay for teams on loan. He works hard, but perhaps he's too one-dimensional for the team. It seems as though he scores goals on most pre-season friendlies, but it hasn't been enough for him to impress Wenger. Verdict: He will leave Arsenal this summer.

- Sanchez Watt - It wasn't so long ago that Watt was included in the first team squad for Champions League fixtures. Wenger called him a "street smart" striker, and he can glide across the pitch such is his pace. This could just be that Wenger considers him too green and not ready to contribute yet. Verdict: He will go on loan this summer.

- Gavin Hoyte - He went on loan last year, and we've heard very little about him since. He has been given a new contract though. Has he improved his defending? Is he better than his older brother? Verdict: He will go on loan this summer.

- Nacer Barazite - He's talented, but way too frail. He's been out numerous times with lengthy injuries. Calling him mercurial would be a complement, he's not consistent enough. Verdict: He may stay, but he'll never make the First Team.

- Mark Randall - An almost man. He can't contribute much to this Arsenal team other than a decent passing range. Verdict: He may stay, but he'll never make the First Team.

- Not all is lost though. Frimpong did well enough against Barnet to suggest that he could eventually be Alex Song's understudy. Henri Lansbury was one of Watford's most important players. Jay Emmanuel-Thomas is a man without a position, but will be given a chance to prove his value. Conor Henderson is an unknown quantity, but Wenger rates him. Nordtveit is either going to show he can play for Arsenal or will be sold to a foreign league.

- With the pre-season camp underway, this is where Wenger's influence on the team will be felt the most. It's unfortunate that Robin and Cesc are still on holiday, but that's what happens after major tournaments.

- One final note, hopefully van Persie's switch to No. 10 will end his injury problems and he will become the player we know he can be.

Monday, July 19, 2010

The Informer Retires

I apologize to French Lovin Cunt (FLC) and any 1886 reader for wrongly announcing that Arsenal had signed Joe Cole on a free transfer.

This morning I woke up and read on Twitter that the cunt had signed for Liverpool on a four year contract. I felt like a fucking a fool and immediately sent an E-mail to FLC saying that I was sorry.

I fucking hate apologizing but when you make bold and foolish statements about who Arsenal are going to sign or have signed - and then you get them wrong - you need to face the music and put your hands up and say "I'm a cunt."

Why Joe Cole has signed for Liverpool is anyone's guess. It can only be for the money. Cole will not be playing Champions League football next season. Liverpool have no chance of winning the title even if they keep Gerrard, Mascherano and Torres. They are in massive debt and are looking for new owners to get them out of debt.

Giving a man who is 29 in three months time, a four year contract worth 90,000 pounds a week and a signing on fee is risky especially with Cole's injury record. On paper, it looks as though Liverpool have a good deal. The signing of Cole will convince the likes of Gerrard and Torres to stay and make Liverpool fans believe that they are ready once again to challenge for major honors.

Liverpool funded the Cole deal by selling Yossi Benayoun to Chelsea for 5.5 million pounds, Emiliano Insua to Fiorentina for 5 million and releasing left-back Fabio Aurelio from the wage bill.

Roy Hodgson was correct when he told reporters that he will need to sell or release players in order to sign players.

As for Jamie Redknapp's assertion that Joe Cole made the right decision in snubbing Arsenal and Spurs for Liverpool is foolish. Both North London clubs are playing Champions League football this season - Spurs do have to get past the qualifying stage. Liverpool, on the other hand, are playing once again in the Europa League.

With Arsenal, Joe Cole has a chance of winning the Premier League. At Liverpool, he has a chance of winning only the cup competitions.

Maybe Joe Cole doesn't have the hunger inside him anymore to win major trophies. He's won every major English trophy with Chelsea and it seems he wants to end his career with one last major pay day.

Only time will tell.

One thing is for sure, Chelsea fans must be slightly aggrieved. Chelsea sign the 30 year old Yossi Benayoun for 5.5 million pounds only to lose a younger - and arguably more talented - Joe Cole for nothing to their hated enemy Liverpool.

Nevertheless, do Arsenal really need Joe Cole? It looks as though Fabregas is staying - at least for one more year - and the emergence of Jack Wilshire has made many Gooners question if we actually need an older injury prone prototype in Cole?

I think that we need a new goalkeeper and central defender than a play maker such as Joe Cole.

I am starting to get very worried about the goalkeeping situation but I won't be checking Newsnow to see if Arsenal have signed one or are about to sign one. Nor will I be trying to wind up FLC by announcing signings that I have no knowledge of.

Instead, I announce my retirement.

Keep it Arsenal

The Informer

Sunday, July 18, 2010

It Might As Well Be Me


General Dante sent me an email Friday listing the squad likely to face Barnet on Saturday. The first name caused a reaction that stopped me reading the rest of the list. The poodle walker's name is one I haven't written or uttered since some time in late April. Seeing him as one of the chosen keepers to face Barnet made my skin tingle but not in an, "ooh, that was nice please do it again" way. No! No way!

I felt like shutting down. I didn't feel right. My frustration levels peaked. Desperation and an anger chipped away at me from inside like that damn woodpecker that woke me this morning.

It irritates me that we haven't sent this guy on his way. I did not watch the first pre-season match. I refused to, thinking that the poodle-walking fraud would play. During and after the match however, I did get updates from one of my colleagues and later got news from the other that the clown didn't play. Let's hope he does not feature in any upcoming matches either.

Could we finally be on the verge of selling the cunt?

I would be happier than a pig in shit were that to be the case. The guy in the picture above will live the rest of his life not knowing I took his picture. He will not know that I would rather he played in goal than the poodle walker. At least I'd be able to laugh at this guy. The incumbent makes me want to cry.

Come on Arsene! Do your duty. This one's a real and legitimate duty. It's not the type that would have you starting fights at MLS matches. Improve the team with a move that will make me whole again. Buy a proper goalkeeper and an able, ambitious understudy to push him while Vito Manone and Wojszczesny battle it out to be the third option, or better.

On another note; I have to say that it would not be easy for me to trust Cesc now if I were an Arsenal team-mate. How do I go into battle with a captain who yearns to be somewhere else? And I imagine that might have applied to Patrick as well all those years ago. I've spoken to people who feel that Wenger is to blame because he hasn't matched the player's ambitions. I wonder if it's not about more than what Wenger has or has not done.

Another guy said that the Arsenal board are afraid of a confrontation. The player is under contract at Arsenal. We don't need to seek a confrontation with anybody. We need to know that Cesc will give at least 100% to our efforts in trying to win trophies. End of...for now.

Chat later!

Friday, July 16, 2010

Wenger Shuts the Door

- Barcelona have admitted defeat in their chase for Cesc Fabregas. They have also concluded an 11.2 million pound transfer for Adriano (the left back from Sevilla). They won't have the funds needed to buy Cesc, even at their delusional valuation price.

- "Arsenal feel very hurt by Barca. They don't want to listen to offers or sell and they are not putting the player on the market. There was a strong dispute a few months ago and they have not forgotten it." - Sandro Rosell, Barcelona President

- He goes on to suggest that nobody would pay 50 million pounds for Cesc. That's perfectly fine with us. Cesc can leave for Barcelona. In five years.

- Let's be clear, it's obvious that Cesc pined for a return back to Catalunya, but he wasn't desperate enough to hand in a transfer request. That has less to do with his desire as much as his respect for Arsene Wenger and Arsenal. Barcelona have basically hung Cesc out to dry, and it's time to welcome our captain back with open arms (if anybody even thought about being overly critical of Cesc).

- This, the act of defying Barcelona, is an action of a big club. We are a big club. It's time for us to act like this all of the time.

- With that, our first preseason game is upon us. The start of the season is merely a few weeks away.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Henry is a New Yorker

French Lovin Cunt laughed when I told him that I bought a New York Red Bull top from Marshalls for $20. That was two years ago. He laughed when I told him that Arsenal are signing Joe Cole.

You get the picture.

I'm not a fan of the MLS but it's slowly progressing. The Beckham signing was all show - and a piss poor one at that. Beckham has spent more time playing on loan for AC Milan or being injured than he has for the Galaxy.

It serves the Galaxy right for trying to be spoken in the same breath as Barcelona or Real Madrid by signing a fading 34 year old has been. The Beckham signing gave the Galaxy a fake status but was just a marketing stunt - nothing else.

If Beckham and his anorexic wife are all about the jet setting lifestyle - Hollywood, modelling, hanging out with Tom Cruise - Henry is more down to earth. He's more New York.

Footballing wise, LA Galaxy and the New York Red Bulls are shit and so is the MLS.

Could this all change with the Red Bulls signing Arsenal legend Henry? No, but it will raise the profile of the Red Bulls and the MLS.

Henry is only 32. He still has a season or two of magic in him, but one player can't make a team. I think that the lack of quality in the MLS will frustrate Henry but his time spent in New York will make up for that.

If you live in New York, you have a great opportunity to meet Henry in person. The Scum play the Red Bulls on July 22nd. It will be interesting to see how many Scum fans turn up to see Harry Twitch-face and his Champions League pretenders and how many Gooners will attend to support Henry.

The game could be more interesting in the stands. If you go to the game and meet a Scum fan just remember that cunt Danny Rose and how miserable you were when co-commentator and ex-Scum striker Paul Walsh starting masturbating over Spurs. Think of David Bentley and his horrible smug face. Remind yourself of that 4-4 draw at the Emirates when Arsenal were leading 4-2 with two minutes left.

Then punch the Scum fan as hard as you can in the head.

You are a Gooner. Do your duty!

El Cunto

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Is There Happiness Around The Bend?


Be it Patrick or Thierry or any other player before or after them, the best way to squelch rumours about where you want to play is to categorically state so. “I want to play for Hayes” or “I want to play for Baranquilla” or “I want to play for Arsenal”. I haven’t heard that from Cesc Fabregas stating that he is leaning toward Arsenal or Barcelona. Have I missed the actual quotes that make it as clear as clear can be?

I’ve read what many (perhaps too many) other people feel about where he should or will play. The times I’ve seen direct quotes from the player himself have been few. Yes, I admit to reading far fewer stories about Arsenal than most people do but that makes it worse since I sift through the rubble first and try to read only the credible sources. Cesc hasn’t been clear when he has spoken.

All summer long, others have posted, printed, assumed, speculated, and guessed that he will go back to Spain. The player has said that a pre-World Cup conversation with Arsene Wenger was a moving, perhaps life-altering experience. He has said that his future is not in his hands.

What does all that mean?

He will go home at some point but frankly, I don’t know if he’s coming or going. Meanwhile our first pre-season match is less than a week away. I refuse to read, much less believe, every story written (especially those without quotes) so my sources are not endless. Actually, most people’s sources are limited, even if they would have you believe otherwise. Therein lies the basic problem with transfer rumours. They are seldom credible yet they grow feet on a logarithmic scale.

Nearly every summer, Arsenal were to lose Patrick Vieira. He was reported years later to have stalled on going to La Liga because of the way Real Madrid treated Claude Makelele. Ok! So he did at least consider the move. What irks me to no end is the non-stop media manipulation of situations, making Arsenal look impotent and unable to keep its best players. We kept him for nearly a decade. And like Henry, we got his peak years. Spread that across your banners. Lead with those stories. Obviously, I’d be naïve to expect that. Especially as long Arsene Wenger is still at Arsenal. There are many parties just waiting to heap more crap on him as our trophyless spell continues. Many of them wear the Arsenal top. The other major annoyance is that in situations like this, the player himself can (and should, IMO) state what he wants, clearly. I’d be naïve to expect that too. Agents would surely advise against it. It doesn’t make good business sense.

So where are we with this Cesc thing? Arsenal fans (not excluding myself from that group though I am not in full agreement with the notion that we’ve been wronged, necessarily) are upset that Pique and Puyol draped Cesc with a Barcelona top during the World Cup winners’ celebration. Let’s be clear. That action was not wise but nor was it the worst thing they could do. The pressure is clearly on Cesc now (if not Wenger/AFC) more than ever to stop the madness. I wouldn’t be upset with Cesc and the poodle walker if they put an Arsenal top on Casillas in public. I wouldn’t be upset with them if they put one on Xavi Alonso in public. I wouldn’t mind if Sagna and Diaby put one on Franck Ribery. Perspective must be considered in these cases.

I’m more bothered by Cesc not being forthright than I am by fellow Catalunyans trying to sway him to leave London. Why should we expect them to care about our feelings as Arsenal fans? How many Arsenal fans sent letters of apology to Barcelona fans when we moved Cesc to London? We can complain all we want about other peoples’ behavior – even if legitimately so in some cases - but again, perspective, perspective, perspective. And moreover, why doesn’t Cesc allay Arsenal fans with more directness? Are negotiations ongoing?

Throughout all this, we are seemingly en route to starting a new campaign with Clown no.1 and his ‘exceedingly impressive in training’ understudy as our goalkeepers. It bothers me to no end that we haven’t sent those two cokscuers on their way yet. I have extreme patience for Arsene Wenger. What I don’t have is time for those two poor excuses for bad amateurs. The only bright spot is that they cannot possibly get worse. Right? I am right about that part at least, right?

Concerned! Very concerned!!!

Monday, July 12, 2010

Not Vintage

- Nobody can dispute the fact that Spain were worthy winners of this World Cup. Additionally, nobody can really say that this was a vintage World Cup champion. If they don't continue this run (and they very well could) and expand upon it, they could be remembered primarily in history books only.

- 8 goals in 7 games speaks for itself. One may say that it's because teams came to frustrate Spain, and that is also true. But observe the Spanish starting lineup and see that they had two holding players, although Xabi Alonso is a fine passer of the ball as well. Additionally, with Xavi in front of them, they were hard to break down as well. Spain set out to win the tournament, and that was their primary objective above and beyond any obligation to play aesthetically appealing football. There is actually nothing wrong with that, but the style that they're being praised for simply didn't come off in this tournament.

- Perhaps if Torres was fit, they could have been more explosive. Perhaps if Cesc Fabregas had played more, they would have banged in more goals. Subsequently, does Cesc actually earn the plaudits he deserves this time around? He is virtually a forgotten man when it comes to Spain's Euro 08 triumph, and this time around he started exactly zero matches. That didn't prevent him from instantly changing matches and providing the assist for Iniesta's World Cup clinching goal.

- I think the Spanish players realize how good Cesc Fabregas is. Just ask Puyol and Pique, who today draped a Barcelona jersey around him, taking their campaign to bring Cesc back to Barcelona to an embarrassing level. They're being counterproductive to Barcelona's scheme to buy back Cesc for as cheap as possible. To me, it's clear that Cesc wants to be back amongst his amigos in Catalunya. And if that's what he wants, the Barcelona brass should pay what he's worth. The market dictates how much a player like Cesc Fabregas is worth. If Yaya Toure (a fine player by the way) is worth 25 million pounds, then Cesc is certainly worth double that.

- Certainly, there were teams that I was pulling for in the World Cup. The World Cup is a spectacle that should be enjoyed. Living in the States, you wish that everything would shut down for a month (as most countries seem to do during the World Cup), just so you could enjoy it all. Let's be clear though, Arsenal losing to Stoke affects me far more than anything the World Cup can offer. And with that, let's shift our minds back to the club we hold dear to our hearts.

- Arsene, we're ready for more. Let's go win trophies.

World Cup is over. Transfer market takes over


Last week, the big rumor was that Arsenal were about to launch another bid for Pepe Reina. Rumors about Reina's transfer to Arsenal started to appear back in April. Then in May, according to certain tabloid newspapers, Arsenal had a 14 million pound bid for Reina turned down.

Now the Reina to Arsenal rumors have resurfaced with Arsenal reportedly about to make a 20 million pound bid.

Reina signed a new 6 year contract at Liverpool before the World Cup and has reiterated his desire to stay at Liverpool despite Rafa Benitez moving to Inter Milan.

Many Arsenal fans are expecting the club to announce the signing of veteran Australian goalkeeper Mark Schwarzer. However, no interest seems to have resurfaced since Fulham turned down Arsenal's bid of 2.5 million pounds last month. Nevertheless, the latest rumors are that Schwarzer failed a medical due to his knee.

What is certain is that Wenger is in the market for a goalkeeper, which is good news.

I've been getting a lot of e-mails regarding Joe Cole. Fans have been asking me how do I know that Arsenal have signed him.

Harry Redknapp is the only manager who has made public statements with regards to signing Joe Cole. On June 1st, Mr. Redknapp said that he believed that Joe had already signed for someone else. Today, the Spurs boss claims that his chairman is attempting to talk to Cole's agent and father.

Let's look at the clubs that Joe Cole might sign for.

Chelsea - he's leaving them.

Manchester United - counted themselves out three weeks ago.

Liverpool - they are paying 770,000 pounds in interest every week. They can't afford him.

Manchester City - Cole wants to stay in London and play Champions League football. No go.

Spurs - questions remain on whether they can afford his demands. They might if they can get past the Champions League qualifier and have a successful US tour.

Arsenal - never comment on any transfers until they are signed and sealed. Wenger nor any high ranking employee at Arsenal have said anything regarding Joe Cole. Neither has the player.

The sticking point could be Cole's desire to play in the Fabregas role. Harry Redknapp is promising Cole that role.

Personally, I am more concerned about signing a quality goalkeeper.

I can't take another season with Almunia and Fabianski in goal. It's enough to turn me into a Miami Heat fan.

Keep it Arsenal

The Informer

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Dream Come True

















A Post Match View was scheduled but after 120 minutes of less than memorable football, I've opted not to detail the highs and lows. You'll forgive me, please. I felt the football was underwhelming in general and at times embarrassingly subpar, especially for a FIFA World Cup Final.

There are always levels of apprehension and tension - if not in the mind then surely in the tactics - when you play a final. This match was no exception. To make matters worse, neither side featured a real star that could change the game. Sure, Villa, Xavi, Iniesta, Sneijder, Robben, and our own Robin van Persie can add spark to a game as well as any player around but they are not on that true world class level that it takes to save the spectacle from the dour.

What we saw today was not attractive. Do players compete in too many matches with their clubs during the season? Does football just not have the personnel to create and excite on the level of the truly great players of the past? The tournament was a success but what will it be remembered best for? Certainly not the play on the pitch, in my opinion.

Each side had chances. Although Spain did dominate in terms of possession and did take more initiative, Holland could have won the title if Arjen Robben and Joris Mathijsen hadn't wasted their opportunities. Full credit to Casillas for stopping Robben one-on-one not once but twice. Even Johnny Heitinga had a good chance to open the scoring. And a word for Stekelenberg, a keeper I don't rate. He was outstanding today.

A mate asked me at Half-Time what rating I'd give Howard Webb. I said 7.75 from 10. I felt he did a good enough job of controlling the game. The tackles were almost non-stop for long periods. Tempers, frustration, and incessant cheeky fouls could have upset the proceedings. Naturally, I feel van Bommel should have been sent off. I would feel that way regardless though.

Although I approve of Webb's performance, Nigel De Jong's boot to the heart (literally) of Xavi Alonso should give him reason enough to accept that he could have done a better job with his cards. The final tally for yellows was 13 and of course Heitinga got himself sent off when he held back match winner Andres Iniesta in the second period of extra time. It really should have been two reds, in my view. De Jong's was a gutless act.

An ex girlfriend sent me a text saying that the Dutch were playing "savagely". This from a woman who knows as much about football as I do about baking. Almost nothing at all!

I gathered that many people were troubled by Spain defeating Germany. Spain is a team of excellent technicians in midfield, dangerous and usually clinical strikers up front, and an adequate back line with an excellent keeper. Against a team like Holland, a team that came to stifle play rather than to create it, Spain can look less than impressive. Let's be clear though, this Dutch side got to the final because they were either tactically superior when they had to be or individually better than the teams they'd faced en route. Today they only came to nullify Spain, not to take the game to them.

I'm not sure what van Marwijk's thinking was and nor am I second guessing him. What I will say is that he will more than likely never get to another FIFA World Cup Final. Deploying both Nigel De Jong and Mak van Bommel seemed ultra defensive to me.

No team on this planet can out pass or out possess Spain when they are firing on all cylinders. That makes it all the more important to create and finish as many chances as possible. With two destroyers in midfield, they did limit Spain's attacks but created very few of their own. Why not play a more offensive side? Why leave Robin on his own when it became clear that Sneijder was going to play a minor role, thanks to a packed midfield with little space and Xavi Alonso and Sergio Busquets shielding the vulnerable Puyol.

If I hear someone call that guy a great player again I'll kick him. How slow do you have to be to be outrun by Arjen Robben?!?!? Yeah, Robben is quick but fast he is not.

It can also be said that the game was headed to penalties and that Spain did not manage to score. That's half the battle. Mr. van Marwijk has every right to tell me to go home, that I don't know what I'm talking about. Besides, how often does Arjen Robben miss two breakaways?

I'm happy for Vicente del Bosque. His accomplishments make being dismissed by Real Madrid even more absurd. He seems a decent man. Of course I congratulate Cesc Fabregas. Does this mean he's more likely to want to go back to Catalunya? I'm happy for Andres Iniesta. He is an under-rated player.

I wouldn't have been upset by the Dutch winning but that sentiment has more to do with Robin van Persie and the great Dutch players of the past. This collection is severely tainted with the likes of De Jong, van Bommel, and Heitinga (a player I used to have time for). Plus the sight of Arjen Robben diving stays with me. Perhaps justice was served.

One thing for sure, Iniesta's dream came true. Quite a nice gesture as well to commemorate the departed Dani Jarque. Brazil 2014 next. It should be special.

We play Barnet Saturday. Big season ahead. I said that last season, and the one before. Where's our new keeper?

Chat later!


Saturday, July 10, 2010

What Dreams Are Made Of

- Don't let anybody fool you. No matter what people say about the Champions League, the one trophy everybody covets the most is the World Cup. For that reason, enjoy the match.

- The previews have come fast and thick from everywhere, so there's no need to cover it that much.

- The Spanish style has Dutch origins. Barcelona would not be Barcelona without Rinus Michels, one of the three best managers of all time. And Spain would not be the same without him.

- I would dispatch van Bommel to give Xavi a rough time. You can hate him, but van Bommel could care less. He's there to harass and give players a hard time. Dirk Kuyt is not a player I particularly rate, but he brings balance to this Dutch side. On closer inspection, the Dutch have a better balance than the Spanish side.

- The Spanish defense has been solid because they have two holding players in Xabi Alonso and Busquets. Their actual central defenders don't actually impress me. I feel as though they're due a mistake; I hope that happens.

- From an Arsenal perspective, does this World Cup make Cesc want to leave more or less? I can't be sure to be honest. All I know is that I'm sick and tired of hearing all the Barcelona players talk about Cesc wanting to leave. It almost makes me wish we sold him sooner rather than later. I leave it in the hands of Wenger, but I don't doubt that Cesc wants to leave now. He just doesn't want to leave without class (unlike LeBronze James).

- Robin van Persie hasn't clicked in this World Cup. He didn't click during the first games of the last season for Arsenal either. Then, all of a sudden, he started banging them in. This match may come down to whether Villa or van Persie takes their chance.

- Either way, a new addition to history will be made. Spain or Holland. Check back tomorrow to read how it all unfolded.

They Said...





















In anticipation of tomorrow's final, I went searching for some quotes I might have missed during the tournament. I've found several worthy of reprinting. Some are somber and reflective. Some are cutting and direct. Others are seemingly uneventful but did catch my eye regardless.

"But it was a shame for Africa when Ghana did not make the Semi-Finals. It would have been a firework for Africa." Arsene Wenger

"With all respect to the players in Argentina, there is no comparison between the two. At Barcelona, he [Messi] has splayers of his level." Dani Alves

"If you don't understand the line-up then maybe you should change trade and give up being journalists." Marcello Lippi

"Rooney insulted me. He said, 'fuck you'. He must learn to control his temper." Referee Jeff Selogilwe

"I am Dutch but I support the football that Spain is playing." Johann Cruyff

"I prefer a calm coach on the bench like van Marwijk, rather than an idiot like Maradona or Dunga." Wesley Sneijder

"Rafik Saifi slapped the face of journalist Asma Hamili. She hit him back as a reflex. He then threw a bottle of sports drink which missed and had to be restrained from attacking her again." BBC's Richard Connelly on what happened in the mixed zone after Algeria's last minute defeat to the U.S.

"I cannot imagine an international player [Yakubu] missing a goal that was almost two to three meters to a goal post and he was laughing or smiling. There was no sign of regret." Nigerian Minister of Sport Ibrahim Bio

It will be an honour to do the first 1886 Post Match View of a FIFA World Cup Final tomorrow. Cesc is dying to play. I get that but COME ON ROBIN, even if it means that van Bommel gets to raise the trophy.

Chat later!

Thursday, July 8, 2010

A message from The Informer

I am signing for Arsenal. Be Patient.

Joe

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

On van Bommel


I have no problem with the Dutch getting to the final. I won’t have a problem with them winning the final. They are overdue. All past failures are now out the window.

What I have a problem with is cheering for a man like Mark van Bommel. He is truly a cunt. His type are the reason FIFA instituted a series of laws that help protect positive, offensive football. No fouls from behind. No “professional fouls”. No repeated, systematic, tactical obstruction of free flowing play, etc.

Poor refeering has undermined the ruling body’s efforts in many ways but more than anything else, I can point to cynical, gutless cunts like van Bommel as petty criminals on the pitch. Cynical because he will foul first and then attempt to play football. Gutless because he doesn’t trust his abilities as a footballer and chooses to play outside or on the edge of the rules.

OK! Everybody cheats. Most people (forget athletes competing for large sums) push the rules as far as they can go. What this Dutch holding midfielder does is absolutely disgraceful. That he has gotten away with it all tournament long is pathetic.

Laurent Blanc was a classy center back - a cool, skillful, tactically and technically sound player. He was forced to watch France defeat Brazil in the 1998 FIFA World Cup Final from the stands because a cunt named Slaven Bilic conned the ref into believing that Blanc had assaulted him. Blanc was red-carded and missed the final. Gutted is an extreme understatement. To think that van Bommel has not been red-carded for what he's gotten away with is appalling.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Actual Outrage/British Outrage

- The yellow card rule in the World Cup is a joke. We will be deprived of watching Thomas Muller take on the Spanish after he received a yellow card for an innocuous handball. With the lack of consistency between refs, to be banned after two yellow cards in five matches is absolutely ridiculous. FIFA have decided to cancel out all yellows after the quarterfinal in order to protect star players from missing the final. They're not doing enough.

- The outrage over Luis Suarez's goal is outrageous. Yes, he handled. Yes, he celebrated with his teammates. No, he is not the devil. No, he did not cheat Ghana out of the World Cup. Ghana was awarded a soft free kick, two Ghana players were offside when the cross came into the box, and Gyan missed a penalty kick. So had Uruguay lost to the headed ball, they could have justifiably claimed that they were knocked out due to a refereeing error. It's the same complaint you'll hear from Arsenal about the Champions League Final against Barcelona. All Arsenal players will tell you that Eto'o was offside. So what? It doesn't change anything. As for this case, Suarez did what he had to do for his country and his teammates. It would be nice if the World Cup was purely an exhibition of stylish football, great sportsmanship, and unity. But above all, it is a competition. Kids shouldn't be concerned with being ruthless warriors fighting for results. Professional athletes should be. Gyan missed a penalty, so the lack of an offside call didn't hurt Uruguay. I have a phrase I like to use, "Ball Don't Lie." If only that was true 100% of the time.

- It seems awfully condescending that the British media would jump all over the handball incident. They did the same thing with Ireland and Thierry Henry. Why the fuck should they care? Aww... poor Ireland. Aww... poor Ghana. It's football. Being sanctimonious about meaningless stuff puts you in a position where you'll end up having a shit pie thrown in your face, and you just might not like the taste of it.

Monday, July 5, 2010


If Holland win the World Cup, they will have played the following teams:

Iceland
Scotland
FYR Macedonia
Norway
Denmark
Japan
Cameroon
Slovakia
Brazil

and Uruguay

Apart from Brazil and Uruguay, the other countries are hardly world beaters. This is not Holland's fault, after all they've beaten every team that Fifa has put in front of them. The quality of teams that Holland has played is a reflection, however, on the weakness of Fifa.

The qualification process for the World Cup Finals is flawed. Teams such as San Marino, Luxembourg, Barbados, Grenada, New Caledonia and American Samoa should play in a tournament to qualify for the World Cup qualifiers.

Fifa need to tell Scotland, Wales and England that they have to join forces and play as Great Britain just like they do in the Olympics. That way the xenophobia and jingoism that comes with the English national team will disappear. The nasty English tribalism that runs through the veins of Stoke fans will be condensed and so will the songs about World War Two.

Key to a British football team is a British Premier League involving 18 teams. Gone will be teams such as Stoke, Blackburn Rovers and Wolves or teams that have an average home attendance of just over 10,000 like Wigan and Blackpool.

Holland have been now won 15 straight World Cup matches, including qualifiers. Their coach Bert van Marwijk won the 2002 UEFA Cup with Feynoord. His son-in-law is the Dutch midfield hard man Mark van Bommel.

In Euro 2008, Holland crushed France 4-1 and Italy 3-0 before they lost to Russia in the quarter-finals. So far in this World Cup they haven't crushed anyone but they got past the quarter finals and Brazil.

Holland have very good attacking options: Van Persie, Robben, Sneijder, Kuyt, Babel, Huntelaar, and Van der Vaart. But in defence they're weak in depth. Arsenal reject Giovanni van Bronkhorst and Blackburn Rovers reject Andre Ooijer are both 35, while their goalkeeper at times plays like Manuel Almunia.

The Dutch have made two finals in the World Cup - 1974 and 1978 - where on both occasions they played the host nation.

This time, 2010, will be different. The host nation are out and if Holland meet Spain we will have new winners of the famous gold trophy.

At least then you can say that international football is less predictable than club.

Keep it Arsenal

Sunday, July 4, 2010

And Then There Were Four


Uruguay - The only person who told me that Uruguay were going far in this tournament is a United fan I know, living in Mumbai. I dismissed the thought in a way but because of football's ever unpredictable nature, I also knew that they have Diego Forlan and he could make a difference. After his sad spell at United, Forlan has become one of Europe's more prolific goal scorers. His strike partner Luis Suarez is also a very capable finisher. Ironically, it's his "defending" that has helped Uruguay reach the last four.

Holland - I've watched the 1978 FIFA World Cup Final many times. The Dutch players in that losing team were quite a cast. How they lost is still hard to understand. How Brazil lost to Robin & Co. this time around is baffling, even if not on the level of the 1978 Argentina vs. Holland result.

All I'll say is Arsene, PLEASE forget about that Felipe Melo character. A great man called him a dumb thug. I've never met Melo but in this case, guilty until proven otherwise. Disgraceful!

The much anticipated Germany vs. Holland final is very possible, maybe even likely. Wesley Sneijder is on fire. Arjen Robben is fit. Robin van Persie is fit. Mark van Bomel is a cunt.

Germany - My colleague pointed out that this current version is one of the most likable German teams that he has seen. No argument here. They are the business, no doubt about it. And what's scary is they will be around for a while. They've been the form team and look a difficult nut to crack. If you don't like their chances to win it all, you are smoking crack.

Spain - This has been a strange tournament for Spain. Yet like other teams that have had slow starts in past tournaments and have gone on to lift the trophy, they can still win it all. I thought after they lost to Switzerland that they would still be difficult to knock out. They are too deep and too talented to take lightly. Spain vs. Germany should be a cracker.

I watched the Paraguay Spain 1/4 final at a Liverpool supporter's bar with a high ranking member of the Bermie Army. The asscrack in the Spain shirt, Cornell baseball capped turned backwards, and vuvuzela slung over his back like a bow was the only negative in an enjoyable match watching experience. I'm not sure if that noise making annoyance knows how many people wanted to crack his head and then shove that thing down his throat. I don't mind the horn (in the stadia) but you need to blow it inside a small space, dude? Really??? Needless to say, Captain Dante was not impressed.

If Africa were to unite on social, political, and economic levels the way the continent supported Ghana on its run to the last eight, such would be the potential for empowering the people of that most pillaged and under-achieving region of the world that we might see certain parties preempt the progress with another round of rumors about WMD's. Football's most precious quality is how it unites people. This tournament has provided dramatic moment after dramatic moment. It has shown the potential in what can be achieved if people unite. That has been as dramatic a result as any other.

On a lighter note, The Informer has released a bit of news that has Denilson being a Barcelona target. It seems that if Mascherano cannot be gotten from Liverpool, the Catalunian side will go after our Neves. Uuugh, ok!

Chat later!